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■iJetrlrartr  ^otitt  St.  Soijn 


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JAN     7  1974 


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Digitized  by  the  Internet  Archive 

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http://www.archive.org/details/childnaturechildOOstjo 


CHILD     NATURE 

AND 

CHILD     NURTURE 


MlTHERTO  too  much  relative  stress  has  been  laid  upon  the 
duties  of  children  to  parents,  while  too  little  attention  has  been  given 
to  the  duties  of  parents  to  their  children.  —  James  Johonnot. 


T  IFE  in  the  Making 


Child  Nature 


Child  Nurture 


A    TEXT-BOOK     FOR     PARENTS'    CLASSES,     MOTHERS' 

CLUBS,   TRAINING    CLASSES    FOR    TEACHERS    OF 

YOUNG  CHILDREN,  AND  FOR  HOME  STUDY 


BY 

EDWARD    PORTER    ST.  JOHN 

A.M.,  PD.M. 

Professor  in  the  Hartford  School  of 
Religious  Pedagogy 


THE     PILGRIM     PRESS 

BOSTON  NEW  YORK  CHICAGO 


Copyright,  igii 
By  Edward  Porter  St.  John 

Entered  at  Stationers'  Hall,  London 


All  rights  reserved 


Published  August,  191  i 


THE-  PLIMPTON-  PRESS 

[  W  •  D  •  O  ] 
NORWOOD  •  MASS  •  U  •  S  •  A 


Ha 

^l4 


PREFACE 

The  topics  that  are  discussed  in  this  little  book 
are  all  related  to  the  training  of  young  children. 
Occasionally  suggestions  are  offered  as  to  the 
application  of  the  principles  that  are  presented 
to  the  shaping  of  the  characters  of  children  who 
are  over  twelve  years  of  age,  but  It  is  chiefly  to 
guard  against  the  danger  of  misunderstanding 
or  misapplication  of  the  methods  that  are  recom- 
mended for  use  with  those  who  are  younger.  The 
difficult  problems  that  rise  in  the  training  of  the 
adolescent  boy  or  girl  have  purposely  been  reserved 
for  future  volumes,  as  in  many  cases  the  methods 
to  be  used  with  them  must  be  very  different,  — 
indeed  sometimes  almost  the  reverse  of  those  that 
will  be  most  helpful  with  the  young  child. 

Even  in  this  limited  field  of  the  moral  educa- 
tion of  the  young  child  the  lessons  deal  with  only 
a  part  of  the  fundamental  problems  that  every 
parent  must  face.  In  a  companion  volume  others 
of  these  will  be  discussed  in  a  similar  way,  especial 
attention  being  given  to  the  matters  that  most 
intimately  concern  the  child's  religious  training. 

The  lessons  are  designed  to  be  suggestive  only. 
The  aim  has  been  clearly  to  present  the  funda- 
mental principles  that  are  Involved,  briefly  to 
indicate  their  application  In  methods  that  are 
useful  in  the  home,  to  refer  the  student  to  the 
best  of  the   most   available   fuller  discussions  of 


PREFACE 

the  various  topics,  and  to  suggest  for  discussion 
practical  problems  of  the  kinds  that  are  continu- 
ally arising  in  every  home. 

The  lessons  are  especially  designed  for  use  in  a 
class  or  club,  and  the  value  of  the  course  of  study 
will  be  greatly  enhanced  if  it  is  carried  on  by  a 
group  of  parents  or  teachers  who  discuss  with 
the  greatest  freedom  every  proposition  that 
appears  in  the  lessons  or  that  is  suggested  by  the 
members  of  the  class. 

The  lessons  have  been  inspired  by  the  writer's 
own  strong  interest  in  the  topics  with  which  they 
deal  and  the  practical  problems  of  parenthood 
which  they  discuss,  and  by  the  stimulating  ques- 
tions and  wise  suggestions  that  have  come  to  him 
from  many  mothers  and  fathers.  Their  especial 
aim  is  to  aid  in  moral  and  religious  education  in 
the  home,  for  here,  the  writer  believes,  the  most 
telling  work  of  character-building  is  to  be  done. 
They  present  an  attempt  to  bring  in  untechnical 
form  the  best  educational  thought  of  the  day  to 
the  aid  of  fathers  and  mothers,  whose  work,  not 
in  spite  of,  but  because  of,  its  very  informality, 
is  more  effective  than  any  that  is  done  in  the 
schools.  The  suggestions  are  offered  with  no 
thought  that  the  writer  has  himself  solved  the 
problems  of  child-training.  Indeed  the  desire  that 
others  may  be  saved  from  some  of  the  mistakes 
that  he  has  made  is  no  small  part  of  his  motive 
in  presenting  them.  No  one  could  regret  their 
imperfections  more  than  their  author  does,  but 
if  they  lead  parents  to  take  their  work  as  edu- 
cators more  seriously,  to  study  their  children 
more  thoughtfully,  and  to  consider  the  little  things 
of  home  life  in  the  light  of  their  effect  upon  the 


PREFACE 

characters  of  their  children,  they  will  have  served 
their  largest  purpose. 

Much  of  the  material  has  already  been  pub- 
lished in  The  Pilgrim  Teacher,  The  Sunday-School 
Journal,  The  Westminster  Teacher,  and  The  Sun- 
day-School Magazine,  and  has  thus  received  a  cir- 
culation of  about  four  hundred  thousand  copies. 
The  reception  that  has  been  accorded  to  it  has 
prompted  to  publication  in  this  more  permanent 
form. 


[vil] 


CONTENTS 

PAGE 

Preface    v 

Chapter  I.  HOW  TO  USE  THE  LESSONS    .         i 

Chapter  H.     CHILD   NATURE   AND 
CHILD  NURTURE 

Lesson     i     Nature  and  Nurture  ....       lo 

Chapter  III.  TRAINING  THE  INSTINCTS 
THAT  ARE  ASSOCIATED  WITH  THE 
PHYSICAL   LIFE 

Lesson     2     The  Training  of  the  Appetite  .        14 

Lesson     3     Dealing     with     the     Restless 

Child 19 

Lesson     4     Dealing  with  the  Nervous  Child      23 

Lesson     5     Teaching   the    Child   about  Sex       27 

Chapter  IV.     HOW   TO   DEAL   WITH 
THE   CHILD'S   FEARS 

Lesson     6     The    Meaning    of    the    Child's 

Fears 32 

Lesson     7     How    to    Deal    with    Different 

Kinds  of  Fear 35 

[ix] 


^  CONTENTS 

PAGE 

Lesson     8     The    Place    of    Fear    in    Home 

Discipline 38 

Lesson     9     The  Place  of  Fear  in  Religious 

Education 41 

Chapter  V.     HOW  TO   DEAL  WITH 
THE  ANGRY   CHILD 

Lesson  10    When  Anger  is  a  Virtue.      .      .       46 

Lesson  ii     How  to  Train  the  Anger  Impulse       49 

Lesson  12    How    to     Deal    with     Fits     of 

Passion 52 

Chapter  VI.     THE  TRAINING   OF 
THE   LOVE   IMPULSE 

Lesson  13     The    Nature    of    Love   and    the 

Uses  that  it  Serves        ...       57 

Lesson  14    Training  the  Child  to  Love      .       61 

Chapter  VII.  TRAINING   THE   CHILD   IN 
UNSELFISHNESS  AND   KINDNESS 

Lesson  15     The    Nature    of    Altruistic 

Feeling         d'] 

Lesson  16    The    Natural    Development    of 

Unselfishness 70 

Lesson  17     The    Culture    of   Unselfishness       74 
Lesson  18     Some  Things  to  Avoid.      .      .      .       jy 

fxl 


CONTENTS 

PAGE 

Lesson  19     The    Moral   Value    of    Playing 

WITH  Dolls 80 

Lesson  20    Training    in    Kindness    to     the 

Lower  Animals 83 

Lesson  21     Training  the  Child  in  Courtesy       87 

Lesson  22     Training  the  Child  to  an  Inter- 
est in  Missions 91 

Chapter  VIIL     TRAINING  THE  CHILD  TO 
REGARD   PROPERTY   RIGHTS 

Lesson  23     How    the     Sense     of     Property 

Rights  Develops 97 

Lesson  24     Training  the  Child  in  Honesty      100 

Lesson  25     Training  the  Child  to  Prudence 

AND  Frugality 102 

Lesson  26    Training  the  Child  in  Generosity     105 


[x'l] 


ILLUSTRATIONS 

Life  in  the  Making Frontispiece 

A  Little  Mother 66 

Listening  to  the  Birds 82 


Child   Nature   and   Child 
Nurture 


HOW  TO  USe\1iE  lessons 

Gathering  a  Class.  —  The  first  step  Is  to  gather 
as  large  a  group  as  possible  of  those  who  are  par- 
ents and  who  are  really  Interested  In  the  moral 
and  religious  education  of  their  children.  Do 
not  forget  that  it  Is  a  parents^  class.  Some  unmar- 
ried or  childless  persons  would  surely  be  helpful 
in  such  classes,  and  they  should  not  be  made 
unwelcome,  but  it  will  certainly  favor  the  success 
of  the  plan  if  ordinarily  membership  Is  limited 
to  those  who  have  a  personal  interest  in  the 
parents'  problems,  and  who  have  had  some  meas- 
ure of  experience  In  attempting  their  solution. 
Often  a  kindergartner  or  teacher  who  has  stud- 
ied and  worked  with  children,  who  realizes  that 
her  experience  has  not  duplicated  that  of  any 
mother,  and  who  is  sufficiently  tactful  to  refrain 
from  dogmatism  and  the  assumption  of  leader- 
ship will  contribute  largely  to  the  interest  and 
profit  of  the  study. 

Young  mothers  are  likely  to  be  most  apprecia- 
tive of  the  privileges  of  such  a  class  and,  by 
exchanging  the  results  of  their  experience  and  read- 

[I] 


CHILD  NATURE  AND  CHILD  NURTURE 

ing,  a  group  made  up  wholly  of  such  individuals 
could  be  exceedingly  helpful;  but  if  some  older 
mothers  who  have  had  successful  experience  can 
be  induced  to  join,  they  can  contribute  much  to 
the  helpfulness  of  the  discussions.  It  should  not 
be  forgotten  that  the  parents  who,  if  left  to  them- 
selves, would  wholly  neglect  such  opportunities 
are  the  ones  who  most  need  them,  and  when 
a  nucleus  of  those  who  are  really  in  earnest  has 
been  secured,  such  others  should  be  encouraged 
to  attend  the  class. 

The  Sunday  school  offers  the  best  opportunity 
for_  the  organization  of  classes  in  most  commu- 
nities. To  encourage  and  supervise  such  work 
Parents'  Departments  have  been  organized  in 
many  schools.  This  department  is  coordinate 
with  the  normal  department,  the  home  depart- 
ment, and  the  other  usual  departments  of  the 
school.  It  should  have  its  superintendent,  as 
do  the  others,  who  should  be  recognized  as  a 
regular  officer  of  the  school.  At  first  there  will 
perhaps  be  need  of  but  one  class,  and  that  is 
likely  to  be  made  up  of  young  mothers;  but  if 
the  work  is  started  there  is  sure  to  be  a  demand 
for  classes  for  parents  of  adolescent  boys  and 
girls,  for  those  who  wish  to  take  a  more  advanced 
course,  one  for  fathers  only,  and  perhaps  still 
others. 

In  some  schools  the  parents  of  the  children  in 
the  junior  or  the  primary  departments  have  been 
gathered  in  classes  that  are  held  under  the  aus- 
pices of  those  departments.  This  plan  helps 
the  Sunday  school  at  the  same  time  that  it  aids 
the  home,  as  it  naturally  increases  the  interest 
of  the  parents  in  the   Sunday-school   training  of 


HOW  TO  USE  THE   LESSONS 

their  children  and  fits  them  for  more  intelligent 
cooperation  with  the  teachers. 

In  other  schools  the  lessons  are  studied,  by  the 
teachers  of  these  elementary  departments  and  the 
parents  of  the  children  who  attend  them,  in  a 
meeting  held  for  this  purpose  at  some  time  dur- 
ing the  week.  Thus  it  serves  as  a  course  in  teacher 
training  for  the  teachers. 

The  leader  of  the  class.  —  The  selection  of  a 
leader  for  the  class  is  a  matter  of  great  impor- 
tance, and  if  possible  it  should  be  settled  in  advance 
after  consultation  by  the  pastor,  superintendent, 
and  others  who  are  Interested  In  that  phase  of 
the  work  of  the  Church.  Sometimes  a  local 
mothers'  club  will  suggest  the  desirable  person. 
But  if  the  right  leader  cannot  be  found  In  advance 
the  choice  may  be  deferred  until  a  group  of  stu- 
dents has  been  secured,  when  the  most  efficient 
one  may  be  selected  from  their  number.  It 
should  be  understood  that  what  Is  needed  Is  not 
a  teacher  who  shall  furnish  the  class  with  Ideas, 
but  a  leader  who  shall  tactfully  draw  out  the 
thoughts  and  experiences  of  the  members,  give 
the  results  of  such  reading  as  cannot  be  reported 
by  others,  and  see  that  the  discussions  are  led 
into  the  most  helpful  channels.  If  the  leader 
can  In  a  brief  sentence  or  two  Interpret  the  experi- 
ence of  some  member  who  Is  not  quick  to  grasp 
a  principle,  harmonize  different  statements  that 
are  not  really  Inconsistent,  and  especially  summa- 
rize at  the  close  the  principles  and  methods  that 
have  been  discussed,  so  much  the  better. 

The  method  of  conducting  the  class.  —  Too 
strong  emphasis  cannot  be  placed  upon  the  fact 
that  the  lesson  outlines   are  not  to  be  regarded 

[3] 


CHILD  NATURE  AND  CHILD  NURTURE 

by  members  of  the  class  as  dogmatic  statements 
of  final  truth  which  need  only  to  be  accepted  or 
memorized,  but  as  bases  of  conversation  and  dis- 
cussion. Every  statement  in  the  lesson  should 
be  put  to  the  test  of  the  approval  of  the  class. 
Wherever  it  is  possible  the  leader  should  take 
especial  pains  to  secure  from  the  experiences 
of  members  illustrations  of  the  points  under  dis- 
cussion. Nothing  will  add  to  the  interest  of  the 
members  in  the  work  of  the  class.  But  it  will 
do  more  than  that.  In  the  best  possible  way 
it  will  help  parents  to  apply  the  principles  and 
methods  under  discussion. 

It  is  exactly  at  this  point  that  the  greatest  fail- 
ure in  our  teaching  occurs,  both  in  the  Sunday 
school  and  in  the  Church.  The  formality  of  the 
sermon  denies  the  preacher  this  opportunity.  The 
teacher  should  make  the  most  of  the  privilege 
which  counts  for  much  in  so  many  ways. 

The  freer  the  expression  of  personal  opinion 
and  the  larger  the  contribution  from  the  experi- 
ences of  the  members  of  the  class,  the  more  valu- 
able will  the  study  be.  And  this  is  true  even 
though  some  of  the  ideas  that  are  so  presented 
are  manifestly  incorrect.  Such  an  expression  of 
opinion  makes  it  possible  for  the  leader  or  some 
member  of  the  class  to  advance  arguments  that 
may  correct  a  misapprehension  that  otherwise 
would  have  been  undiscovered;  and  if  this  is  not 
accomplished  the  error  of  one  person  often  fur- 
nishes a  background  for  the  lesson  which  makes 
its  teachings  far  more  impressive  to  other  mem- 
bers of  the  class. 

Anything  like  dogmatism  in  teaching  is  unwise, 
however  assured  one  may  be  of  one's   position. 

[4] 


HOW  TO  USE  THE   LESSONS 

People  who  cannot  be  convinced  by  clear  state- 
ments of  principle  which  are  illustrated  by  experi- 
ences of  every-day  life  will  not  yield  to  mere 
assertion.  Hence  no  one,  whether  teacher  or 
member,  should  be  supposed  to  give  the  final  and 
authoritative  deliverance  upon  any  subject.  The 
concern  of  the  leader  and  of  each  member  should 
be  to  see  that  which  is  believed  to  be  the  right 
view  is  clearly  and  fairly  presented. 

Reading  should  be  encouraged,  and  reports 
from  those  who  do  it  should  be  called  for,  but  the 
more  the  members  can  be  led  to  the  discussion 
of  their  own  experiences  and  methods  the  more 
interesting  and  helpful  the  study  will  be.  If 
they  are  slow  to  take  part  in  this  way,  introduce 
some  concrete  case,  such  as  they  must  deal  with 
in  their  homes,  and  the  discussion  will  not  lag. 

The  lesson  outlines  that  appear  in  these  pages 
are  designed  to  form  a  basis  for  such  discussions. 
Limitations  of  space  permit  them  to  be  merely 
suggestive,  but  if  they  are  used  as  indicated  above, 
and  especially  if  the  members  are  encouraged  to 
read  upon  the  subjects  that  are  under  discus- 
sion, their  brevity  will  not  be  a  disadvantage. 

Suggestions  for  further  reading.  —  It  will  be 
noted  that  with  each  group  of  lessons  a  number 
of  readings  are  suggested.  All  of  these  are  really 
valuable.  It  will  be  well  if  these  can  be  assigned 
to  different  members,  who  should  be  asked  to 
report  such  helpful  ideas  as  they  find  in  connec- 
tion with  each  of  the  topics.  Most  of  the  books 
to  which  reference  is  made  will  be  found  in 
public  libraries.  If  they  are  not  already  upon  the 
shelves,  it  Is  always  possible  to  secure  the  pur- 
chase  of   books   of   this    kind    by  application    to 

[5] 


CHILD  NATURE  AND  CHILD  NURTURE 

the  proper  authorities.  In  many  places  the 
state  Hbraries  or  the  state  educational  authorities 
will  furnish  from  ten  to  twenty-five  such  books, 
which  may  be  kept  for  periods  of  from  three  to 
nine  months,  at  merely  nominal  expense. 

It  will  be  particularly  helpful  if  the  Church  or 
Sunday  school  can  purchase  a  small  library  of 
books  for  the  use  of  such  a  class,  and  for  general 
circulation  in  the  parish.  Where  the  books  are 
available  in  none  of  these  ways,  the  members  of 
a  class  may  be  urged  to  purchase  each  a  single 
book,  from  readings  in  which  reports  can  be  made 
to  the  class.  If  each  member  purchases  a  differ- 
ent book  a  wide  range  of  thought  will  be  avail- 
able, and  the  books  will  be  permanently  valuable 
in  the  homes. 

To  help  those  who  are  ready  to  take  either  of 
these  steps  the  following  brief  list  is  suggested. 
The  books  may  be  obtained  from  the  publishers 
of  this  book  at  the  prices  indicated,  or  the  first 
five  on  the  list,  which  would  perhaps  form  the 
best  selections  for  schools  which  cannot  purchase 
all  at  one  time,  will  be  furnished  for  four  dollars. 
The  entire  list  will  be  furnished  for  eight  dollars 
and  twenty-five  cents.  > 

Beckonings  from  Little  Hands,  by  Patterson  Du  Bois, 
75  cents  net.' 

A  Study  of  Child  Nature,  by  Elizabeth  Harrison, 
^i.oo  net. 

Childhood,  by  Mrs.  Theodore  Birney,  ^i.oo  net. 

Hints  on  Child  Training,  by  H.  Clay  Trumbull,  $1.25. 

Bringing  up  Boys,  by  Kate  Upson  Clark,  50  cents. 

Household  Education,  by  Harriet  Martineau,  ^1.25. 

The  Unfolding  Life,  by  Antoinette  Lamoreaux,  75 
cents. 

161 


HOW  TO  USE  THE   LESSONS 

Child  Culture  in  the  Home,  by  Martha  B.  Mosher, 
^i.oo. 

Gentle  Measures  in  the  Training  of  the  Young,  by 
Jacob  Abbott,  ^1.25. 

Nursery  Ethics,  by  Florence  Winterburn,  ^i.oo. 

Sources  of  inspiration  and  help.  —  The  National 
Congress  of  Mothers,  the  office  of  which  is  at 
806  Loan  and  Trust  Building,  Washington,  D.C., 
is  an  organization  which  seeks  to  establish  and 
aid  Mothers'  Clubs,  Parents'  and  Teachers' 
Associations,  and  similar  organizations  that  are 
working  in  the  interests  of  child  welfare.  It 
has  fifteen  departments  dealing  with  different 
phases  of  the  subject,  and  publishes  much  useful 
literature.  Chief  among  this  is  the  Child-Welfare 
Magazine,  which  is  issued  t^  times  a  year  at  a 
subscription  price  of  feity;.— €€-nt?^/.  There  are 
state  organizations  auxiliary  to  the  National 
Council  in  the  various  states,  and  the  officers  of 
these  are  always  ready  to  assist  those  who  are 
studying  the  problems  of  motherhood. 


[7 


II 

CHILD  NATURE  AND  CHILD  NURTURE 

There  are  two  great  influences  that  shape  the 
character  of  the  child.  These  are  heredity  and 
environment,  or  nature  and  nurture.  The  first 
is  by  far  the  mightier  force.  It  sets  limits  beyond 
which  the  influences  of  the  second  cannot  go. 
Through  its  influence  parents,  by  their  own  sins 
and  failures,  may  mar  the  lives  of  their  children; 
but,  happily,  human  nature  which  has  been  shaped 
through  the  ages  past  cannot  be  wholly  corrupted 
in  one  or  two  generations.  The  child  of  evil 
parents  commonly  has  the  germs  of  a  large 
share  of  the  virtues  of  mankind  in  his  make-up. 
Whether  these  or  the  grosser  tendencies  of  his 
immediate  ancestors  shall  develop  is  determined 
chiefly  by  nurture.  One  cannot  obtain  figs  from 
thistles,  but  even  a  diseased  tree  can  be  made 
to  produce  beautiful  and  wholesome  fruit  if  it 
is  given  the  right  culture.  When  to  good  hered- 
ity wise  training  is  added,  good  character  is 
assured.  Alas  that  what  we  really  are,  rather  than 
our  unattained  ideals,  determines  what  the  inner 
natures  of  our  children  shall  be!  Alas  that  when 
we  attempt  to  correct  by  training  the  defects  of 
character  we  have  bequeathed  we  should  so  often 
lack  the  skill  to  wisely  use  the  methods  which  we 
approve. 


CHILD  NATURE  AND   CHILD   NURTURE 

A  good  heredity  is  the  best  heritage  that  a 
parent  can  give  a  child.  But  though  it  is  not 
the  strongest  power  to  shape  character,  nurture, 
or  training,  is  surpassingly  important  to  the 
parent,  for  after  the  child  is  born  it  offers  to 
him  the  sole  opportunity  to  shape  the  child's 
life.  If  this  educational  work  is  well  done  it  will 
be  because  the  plans  for  nurture  are  in  harmony 
with  the  laws  of  nature.  Indeed,  the  most  that 
the  parent  can  do  is  to  cooperate  with  God  in 
his  plans  for  the  making  of  a  man  or  woman  from 
the  child. 

The  lessons  in  this  book  deal  with  the  facts  of 
child  nature  which  condition  all  the  effort  of  the 
parent  to  shape  the  child's  character,  and  with 
methods  of  training  that  seem  to  be  in  harmony 
with  the  divine  plan. 

The  following  references  are  designed  to  guide 
the  student's  reading  on  the  subject  of  the  rela- 
tion of  the  child's  natural  development  to  the 
training  that  he  should  receive:  The  Unfolding 
Life,  by  Antoinette  A.  Lamoreaux,  pp.  11-35; 
A  Study  of  Child  Nature^  by  Elizabeth  Harrison, 
pp.  9-12;  Principles  of  Religious  Education, 
chapter  on  The  Religious  Content  of  the  Child 
Mind,  by  G.  Stanley  Hall,  pp.  161-192;  The 
Development  of  the  Child,  by  Nathan  Oppen- 
heim,  pp.  i-io;  The  Making  of  Character,  by  John 
McCunn,  pp.  1-52;  Household  Education,  by  Har- 
riet Martineau,  pp.  31-62;  The  Natural  Way,  by 
Patterson  DuBois,  pp.  54-68;  Lutheran  Teacher- 
Training  Course,  by  Luther  A.  Wciglc,  pp.  9-14; 
The  Story  of  the  Mind,  by  James  Mark  Baldwin, 
pp.  166-199. 

[9] 


CHILD   NATURE  AND   CHILD  NURTURE 


Lesson  I.     Nature  and  Nurture 

Let  us  give  the  children  the  right  start  in  life,  and 
let  us  begin  at  the  very  beginning. 

—  Paul  Carus. 

Nature  must  be  reckoned  with  or  nurture  cannot 
be  reckoned  on.  —  Patterson  Du  Bois. 

The  life  comes  from  God  complete  in  its  possibil- 
ities, but  at  the  beginning  all  is  in  germ. 

—  Antoinette  A.  Lamoreaux. 

Teaching  is  essentially  the  response  of  the  adult  to 
the  moral  and  intellectual  need  and  readiness  of  the 
child.  —  Anon. 

One  of  the  greatest  lines  of  the  world's  work  lies 
before  us:  the  understanding  of  little  children,  in  order 
that  they  may  be  properly  trained. 

—  Elizabeth  Harrison. 

A  little  more  allowance  given  to  the  primal  fact 
that  a  child  is  alive,  and  is  a  child,  and  lives  therefore 
according  to  childhood's  laws,  would  sometimes  stay 
a  too  hasty  interference  with  manifestations  of  pure 
child  life  and  child  nature. 

—  H.  Thistleton  Mark. 

What  determines  whether  or  not  any  course  that  I 
choose  to  lay  out  for  my  child  either  in  the  physical 
or  spiritual  realm  is  nurture.''  Manifestly  the  child's 
nature  itself,  his  life  forces  and  their  laws  of  action 
must   be   the   determining   factor. 

—  Patterson   DuBois. 

Nurture  them  in  the  training  and  admonition  of 
the  Lord.  — Eph.  6:4. 

[lol 


CHILD  NATURE  AND  CHILD  NURTURE 

No  amount  of  "  child  study  "  will  save  teacher  or 
mother  the  trouble  of  studying  her  own  children. 
Even  a  little,  however,  may  helpfully  guide  her  in 
that  task.  —  Edward  Porter  St.  John. 

The  child   differs   by  nature  from  the  adult.  — 

In  many  ways  this  is  true.  In  his  physical  life 
it  is  very  apparent.  The  young  child's  head  is 
fully  twice  as  large  in  proportion  to  its  entire 
body  as  that  of  an  adult,  while  its  legs  are  little 
more  than  half  as  long.  Its  muscles  have  but 
half  of  the  relative  weight,  while  certain  glands 
are  proportionately  fifty  times  as  large  as  in  mature 
life.  In  the  way  he  thinks  the  diflFerences  are  as 
clear.  The  child  is  influenced  far  more  by  the 
suggestion  contained  in  the  act  of  another,  in  a 
picture  or  a  story,  than  by  appeal  to  laws  of  cause 
and  effect.  When  he  attempts  to  reason,  it  is 
largely  by  analogy,  and  if  one  attempts  to  give 
him  knowledge  of  a  kind  that  he  cannot  gain 
through  the  direct  action  of  his  senses,  his  ideas 
are  often  ludicrously  grotesque.  His  feelings  are 
intense,  but  they  are  short-lived.  If  one  wishes 
to  stir  a  particular  emotion  it  must  commonly 
be  done  by  an  appeal  to  his  senses.  The  lesson 
for  the  child  must  surely  diiTer  from  that  for  the 
adult. 

As  he  grows  older  the  child  passes  through 
several  stages  of  development. — The  transition 
to  the  conditions  of  adult  life  is  not  a  uniformly 
gradual  process.  For  several  years  at  a  time 
development  is  rather  slow  and  along  uniform 
lines;  then  comes  a  period  of  rapid  change,  which 
opens  a  new  stage  of  life  in  which  interests  and 
aptitudes    are    different,    and    new    methods    of 

[II] 


CHILD  NATURE  AND  CHILD  NURTURE 

training  are  demanded.  The  most  important 
of  these  changes  comes  at  about  twelve  years  of 
age  and  divides  childhood  from  adolescence, 
both  of  which  are  further  subdivided  in  a  similar 
way.  He  who  deals  with  children  of  widely 
differing  ages  in  the  same  way  courts  failure. 
It  is  with  the  problems  of  training  which  arise 
before  adolescence  that  this  book  chiefly  deals. 

Children  naturally  differ  in  temperament.  — 
All  differ  as  children  from  adults,  and  all  pass 
through  stages  of  development  that  are  substan- 
tially the  same;  but  each  child  has  his  own  per- 
sonality, his  own  way  of  reacting  to  what  goes  on 
about  him.  The  most  obvious  distinction  of 
this  kind  is  between  the  active  child  and  the 
thoughtful  child,  and  this  difference  may  com- 
monly be  seen  in  any  family  where  there  are 
several  children.  The  child  of  the  one  type 
thinks  and  feels  deeply,  and  permanent  impres- 
sions are  made.  The  other  acts  promptly  and 
vigorously  but  only  a  superficial  impression  is 
made.  The  one  is  careful;  the  other  heedless. 
The  one  screams  when  punished  and  perhaps 
fights,  but  soon  forgets;  the  other  makes  little 
resistance  or  outcry,  but  sulks  for  hours.  Many 
other  contrasts  will  occur  to  parents  and  teachers. 
It  is  obvious  that  the  same  method  will  not  be 
equally  effective  in  each  case. 

These  facts  are  hints  of  God's  ways  of  shaping 
the  child's  life.  —  Through  the  orderly  processes 
of  nature  the  child  is  receiving  the  better  part 
of  his  education.  The  most  and  the  best  that 
the  parent  or  teacher  can  do  is  to  cooperate  with 
God  in  this  work.  Out  of  the  needs  and  oppor- 
tunities of  the  child's  nature  the  best  guidance 

[12] 


CHILD  NATURE  AND  CHILD  NURTURE 

in  the  planning  of  lessons  and  methods  of  train- 
ing must  come.  The  methods  that  have  been 
approved  by  the  experience  of  the  past  are  not 
to  be  lightly  discarded,  but  the  final  test  must 
always  be  their  results  in  shaping  the  nature  of 
the  particular  child  in  whose  training  they  are 
to  be  used.  It  is  as  an  aid  to  the  understanding 
of  child  nature  that  the  investigations  of  child 
study  aid  the  parent.  It  is  from  the  point  of 
view  here  suggested  that  each  topic  discussed  in 
the  following  lessons  is  approached. 

QUESTIONS   FOR  DISCUSSIONS 

1.  Henry  Ward  Beecher  said  that  if  a  child  were  well  born  the 
first  time  he  would  be  willing  to  take  the  chances  that  he  would  be 
born  again.     What  did  he  mean?     Do  you  agree  with  him? 

2.  Mention  some  definite  happenings  in  your  own  home  that 
show  the  child's  point  of  view  differs  from  that  of  the  adult. 

3.  Point  out  some  changes  that  you  have  noticed  in  your  children 
as  they  grew  older. 

4.  Have  you  noticed  marked  differences  of  temperament  in  chil- 
dren of  the  same  parents?     Give  particulars. 

5.  Have  you  known  of  cases  of  children  of  bad  heredity  who  were 
brought  up  under  good  influences  and  became  worthy  people? 

6.  Have  you  known  of  children  who  in  spite  of  very  unwise  train- 
ing turned  out  well?     If  so,  how  do  you  explain  it? 


[13] 


Ill 

TRAINING    THE    INSTINCTS    THAT   ARE 
ASSOCIATED  WITH  THE  PHYSICAL  LIFE 

Lesson  II.     The  Training  of  the  Appetite 

In  two  ways  appetite  is  related  to  moral  life. 
It  largely  conditions  bodily  health  and  the  whole- 
someness  of  mental  processes,  and  so  affects 
the  susceptibility  of  the  soul  to  the  higher  spiri- 
tual impressions  that  should  lift  it  above  low  and 
selfish  aims  and  standards.  Again,  the  instincts 
that  are  associated  with  the  satisfaction  of  bodily 
needs  are  so  fundamental  in  their  relation  to 
human  nature  that  their  perversion  easily  leads 
to  faults  that  are  more  distinctly  moral  in  their 
nature.  The  references  below  deal  with  both  the 
preservation  of  health  and  the  moral  problems 
that  are  involved. 

The  Care  and  Training  of  Children,  by  Le  Grand 
Kerr,  pp.  38-58;  The  Care  of  the  Child  in  Health,  by 
Nathan  Oppenheim,  pp.  70-110;  The  Education  of 
Man,  by  Friedrich  Froebel,  Appleton's  Edition,  pp. 
60-63;  A  Study  of  Child  Nature,  by  Elizabeth  Har- 
rison, pp.  39-56;  The  Study  of  the  Child,  by  A.  R.  Tay- 
lor, pp.  12-17;  Christian  Nurture,  by  Horace  Bushnell, 
pp.  271-288;  Making  the  Best  of  Our  Children,  by  Eliza- 
beth Harrison,  pp.  45-52;  Hints  on  Child  Training,  by 
H.  Clay  Trumbull,  pp.  109-118. 

I14] 


TRAINING  THE   INSTINCTS 

Feed  me  with  the  food  that  is  needful  for  me:  lest 
I  be  full,  and  deny  thee,  and  say,  Who  is  the  Lord? 

—  Prov.  30:  8,  9. 

Whether  therefore  ye  eat,  or  drink,  or  whatsoever 
ye  do,  do  all  to  the  glory  of  God. 

—  I  Cor.  10:  31. 

Nature  intended  that  taste  and  digestion  should 
be  warm  friends:  we  have  often  made  them  bitter 
enemies.  —  A.  R.  Taylor. 

A  child's  appetite  in  its  original  normal  state  can 
be  retained  if  the  proper  measures  are  adopted  from 
the  beginning.  —  Martha  B.  Mosher. 

Impressions,  inclinations,  appetites,  which  the  child 
may  have  derived  from  his  food,  the  turn  it  may  have 
given  to  his  senses  and  even  to  his  life  as  a  whole,  can 
only  with  difficulty  be  set  aside,  even  when  the  age  of 
self-dependence   has    been    reached. 

—  Friedrich  Froebel. 

The  child  is  taken,  when  his  training  begins,  in  a 
state  of  naturalness,  as  respects  all  the  bodily  tastes 
and  tempers,  and  the  endeavor  should  be  to  keep  him 
in  that  key;  to  let  no  stimulation  of  excess,  or  deli- 
cacy, disturb  the  simplicity  of  nature,  and  no  sensual 
pleasuring,  in  the  name  of  food,  become  a  want  or 
expectation  of  his  appetite. 

—  Horace  Bushnell. 

The  great  principle  and  foundation  of  all  virtue  and 
worth  is  placed  in  this:  that  a  man  is  able  to  deny  him- 
self his  own  desires,  cross  his  own  inclinations,  and 
purely  follow  what  reason  directs  as  best,  though  the 
appetite  lean  the  other  way.  —  John  Locke. 

I  am  impressed  more  and  more  with  the  fact  that 
children,  as  a  general  rule,  are  in  greater  need  of  atten- 
tion  to    their    hygienic    surroundings,   the  perfecting 

[15] 


CHILD  NATURE  AND  CHILD  NURTURE 

of  their  nutrition,  and  perchance  the  careful  adminis- 
tration of  a  suitable  tonic,  than  they  are  of  discipline. 

—  Le  Grand  Kerr. 

A  normal  appetite  is  the  instinctive  impulse  to 
provide  the  body  with  the  nourishment  that  it 
needs.  —  Not  only  does  a  normal  appetite  prompt 
to  the  taking  of  food  in  sufficient  quantities  to 
maintain  bodily  welfare,  but  it  also  exercises  a 
selection  as  to  the  kind  of  food  that  shall  be  taken. 
Unless  it  has  been  perverted  it  is  in  the  main  a 
safe  guide  as  to  diet,  because  through  the  long 
past  of  the  human  race  it  has  been  shaped  by 
man's  needs.  Thus  sweet  foods  are  naturally 
attractive  to  children  because  sugar  is  rich  in 
certain  food  values.  So  things  that  are  bitter 
or  very  sour  are  distasteful  because  if  they  are 
taken  in  large  quantities  they  are  commonly 
harmful,  while  things  that  are  disgusting  or  nau- 
seating are  those  that  offer  least  nourishment  or 
that  most  endanger  health.  Not  only  is  it  true 
that  the  most  valuable  foods  are  commonly  pal- 
atable, but  it  has  been  found  that  the  processes 
of  digestion  are  more  readily  and  fully  completed 
in  case  of  food  that  is  relished. 

The  appetite  may  be  perverted  by  persistent 
use  of  improper  diet.  —  Except  as  it  is  due  to 
disease  this  Is  the  only  way  In  which  morbid  appe- 
tites are  formed.  Since  instinctive  appetite, 
as  we  have  seen,  works  directly  against  the  forma- 
tion of  such  habits,  they  are  very  rarely  spontane- 
ous. Almost  Invariably  they  are  due  to  the  use 
of  a  diet  that  is  provided  or  urged  upon  the  child 
by  adults,  as  in  case  of  highly  seasoned  foods, 
condiments,   etc.,  or  to  the  overcoming  of  nat- 

[i61 


TRAINING  THE   INSTINCTS 

ural  tastes  because  of  strong  social  Influences, 
as  in  case  of  the  use  of  tobacco  and  stimulants. 
Under  such  circumstances  appetite  at  first  pro- 
tests against  the  use  of  such  substances,  and  pain 
or  discomfort  follows,  but  the  system  so  adapts 
itself  to  the  new  food  that  is  forced  upon  it  that 
while  harmful  effects  continue  the  appetite  comes 
to  demand  it. 

A  child's  appetite  may  be  kept  wholesome  by 
regularly  providing  suitable  food  and  removing 
the  inducements  to  use  that  which  is  harmful.  — 
Thus  habit  reinforces  instinct  and  the  child's 
welfare  is  doubly  guarded.  In  planning  a  child's 
diet  the  parent  must  realize  that  his  requirements 
are  in  many  ways  dlflferent  from  those  of  the  adult, 
and  that  if  his  real  needs  are  satisfied  there  Is 
much  less  danger  that  he  will  desire  unsuitable 
food.  Often  abnormal  appetites  (such  as  the 
desire  to  eat  chalk,  which  is  common  among  school 
children)  are  due  to  a  lack  of  certain  necessary 
elements  of  diet.  Books  to  which  references 
are  made  above  indicate  what  the  Important  needs 
of  the  child  are,  and  what  foods  best  supply  them. 

Habits  of  indulging  appetite  at  the  expense  of 
physical  welfare  tend  toward  moral  laxness.  —  If 
the  pleasure  which  is  associated  with  the  use  of 
suitable  food  as  an  aid  to  its  selection  is  made 
an  end  in  itself  to  the  detriment  of  health,  the 
perversion  of  appetite  Is  not  the  only  evil  result. 
These  instincts  which  are  designed  to  conserve 
bodily  welfare. are  so  fundamental  In  their  nature 
and  have  so  large  a  place  In  the  early  life  of  the 
child  that  if  they  are  abused,  habits  of  self-indul- 
gence In  other  ways  are  very  likely  to  appear. 
The  ascetic  life  of  extreme  and  needless  self-denial 

I17I 


CHILD  NATURE  AND  CHILD  NURTURE 

does  not  always  conduce  to  morality,  but  the 
healthful,  normal  life,  in  which  natural  instincts 
are  reinforced  by  wholesome  habits  and  controlled 
by  reason  and  the  higher  feelings,  surely  lays  a 
firm  foundation  for  every  later  phase  of  character 
building. 

QUESTIONS  FOR  DISCUSSION 

(Discussions  as  to  the  proper  foods  and  the  necessary  quantities 
of  each  should  be  preceded  by  careful  reading  of  authoritative  books 
on  the  subject,  for  recent  investigations  have  made  it  clear  that 
intelligent  parents  have  often  gone  astray  in  their  thought  and 
practise  in  these  matters.  Several  of  the  books  mentioned  above 
deal  with  them  in  detail.) 

1.  Is  it  kindness  to  a  child  to  give  him  all  articles  of  diet,  espe- 
cially such  as  are  of  the  nature  of  luxuries,  that  older  members  of 
the  family  use.'' 

2.  If  not,  how  shall  it  be  avoided  without  harming  the  child  by 
seeming  selfishness.''  Is  it  wise  to  have  children  eat  at  a  separate 
table .^  If  at  the  same  table,  should  they  leave  before  the  dessert  is 
served.^ 

3.  Should  children  be  allowed  to  select  candy  for  themselves? 
What  kinds  are  most  wholesome.''  What  are  the  chief  dangers  to  be 
guarded  against  in  the  use  of  candy  by  children.'' 

4.  What  conditions  favor  the  development  of  gluttony  in  chil- 
dren.^ How  can  it  best  be  corrected?  What  is  the  effect  of  thorough 
mastication  of  the  food  in  this  connection? 

5.  When  does  gluttony  or  the  choice  of  (inhealthful  food  become 
a  moral  fault?  How  can  it  best  be  punished,  if  other  measures 
fail? 

6.  What  are  the  best  methods  of  teaching  temperance  to  young 
children? 

7.  Realizing  that  cigarette-smoking  is  a  perversion  of  appetite, 
how  would  you  attempt  to  prevent  it  in  boys? 


[18 


TRAINING  THE   INSTINCTS 


Lesson  III.     Dealing  with  the  Restless 
Child 

One  of  the  marked  characteristics  of  young 
children  is  their  incessant  activity.  To  find  a 
satisfactory  means  of  controlling  this  is  one  of  the 
most  insistent  and  difficult  problems  of  the  parent. 
The  common  method  of  repression  is  not  success- 
ful from  either  the  point  of  view  of  immediate 
results  or  of  its  effects  upon  character.  Wiser 
plans  are  suggested  in  the  following  readings: 

A  Study  of  Child  Nature,  by  Elizabeth  Harrison, 
pp.  13-32;  The  Study  of  the  Child,  by  A.  R.  Taylor, 
pp.  93—105;  The  Care  of  the  Child  in  Health,  by  Nathan 
Oppenheim,  pp.  146-162;  The  Unfolding  Life,  by  An- 
toinette A.  Lamoreaux,  pp.  41-50;  The  Power  of  Play, 
by  George  H.  Archibald,  pp.  1-42;  Home  Occupations 
for  Little  Children,  by  Katherine  Beebee. 

The  little  frame  must  be  exercised.  Every  human 
function  depends  on  exercise  for  its  growth  and  per- 
fection. —  Harriet  Martineau. 

No  wonder  he  rolls  and  runs  and  jumps  and  tumbles 
and  pulls  and  pushes  and  twists  from  the  moment  he 
opens  his  eyes  in  the  morning  until  he  is  put  to  bed 
at  night.  He  cannot  help  it.  He  ought  not  to  help 
it.     It  is  natural  with  him.     This  is  the  way  he  grows. 

—  A.  R.  Taylor. 

Making  a  restless  child  "keep  still"  is  a  repression 
of  this  nervous  energy,  which  irritates  the  whole  ner- 
vous system,  causing  ill-temper,  moroseness,  and  gen- 
eral uncomfortableness.       —  Elizabeth  Harrison. 

[19] 


CHILD  NATURE  AND  CHILD  NURTURE 

The   motive   back  of  many   a   "don't"   is   worthy, 
and  often  there  may  be  no  alternative   but   instantly 
to  check    an   action,  but  for  the  effect  on  character- 
building  there  is  a  more  excellent  way  than  repression. 
—  Antoinette  A.  Lamoreaux. 

The  very  worst  thing  that  can  be  done  to  such  a 
boy  or  girl  is  to  command  him  or  her  to  sit  still  or  not 
to  act;  and  a  still  worse  thing  —  to  make  a  compara- 
tive again  on  the  head  of  a  superlative  —  is  to  affix 
to  the  command  painful  penalties. 

—  James   Mark   Baldwin. 

Never  prohibit  anything  you  cannot  prohibit. 

—  George  H.  Archibald. 


Much  physical  activity  is  essential  if  the  young 
child's  body  is  to  develop  normally.  —  At  this 
early  period  of  life  growth  is  very  rapid.  If  any 
muscle  is  not  properly  exercised  its  growth  is 
hindered  and  deformity  results.  The  instinct 
that  prompts  the  child  to  perpetual  movement 
during  his  waking  hours  is  one  that  provides  for 
present  health  and  future  welfare.  Without  it 
the  body  would  be  stunted,  and  the  control  of 
the  muscles  would  be  imperfect. 

To  attempt  to  repress  these  movements  of 
the  child  is  to  battle  with  God-ordained  laws  of 
nature.  —  Disaster  is  sure  to  follow  such  effort. 
A  certain  amount  of  energy  is  generated  in  the 
child's  body.  It  must  find  expression  in  move- 
ment. To  attempt  to  check  those  activities  is 
like  closing  the  safety-valve  of  an  engine.  If 
by  strenuous  effort  success  is  attained  for  a  time, 
an  explosion  is  sure  to  follow.  To  bid  a  child 
to  keep  still  when  the  voice  of  God  speaking  in 

[20I 


TRAINING  THE   INSTINCTS 

his  nature  bids  him  wriggle  and  twist  is  both 
foolish  and  wrong. 

Guidance,  not  repression,  is  the  solution  of 
the  parents'  problem.  —  It  is  needless  to  say  that 
the  activities  of  the  child  are  not  to  be  uncon- 
trolled. The  effort  should  be  to  find  a  method 
of  directing  these  forces  into  right  channels.  To 
tell  a  child  what  to  do  is  as  easy  as  to  tell  him 
what  not  to  do,  and  is  vastly  more  effective. 
Mischief  is  simply  misdirected  activity.  If  a 
child  is  merely  told  not  to  do  an  objectionable 
act,  since  he  must  do  something  he  commonly 
turns  to  mischief  of  another  kind.  If  he  is 
guided  to  legitimate  activity,  the  danger  of  mis- 
chief is  eliminated  and  he  is  besides  led  to  actions 
that  have  a  value  in  themselves. 

There  is  a  moral  value  in  substituting  guidance 
for  repression  of  the  activities  of  the  child.  —  To 
be  inactive  means  real  suffering  to  a  healthy 
child.  If  his  movements  are  restrained  by  the  will 
of  the  parent,  the  God-given  impulse  to  activity 
urges  him  toward  self-assertion  and  opposition. 
The  parent  who  continually  says  "Don't"  to 
the  child  is  of  necessity  building  up  in  him  the 
habitual  spirit  of  rebellion  and  disobedience. 

On  the  other  hand,  when  the  child  acts  in  a  way 
that  has  been  suggested  by  the  parent  he  is  uncon- 
sciously receiving  a  training  in  obedience.  He 
is  learning  to  submit  himself  to  the  guidance 
of  the  parent,  and  harmony  of  will  is  fostered. 
The  moral  value  of  such  training  can  hardly  be 
overestimated. 


[21  I 


CHILD  NATURE  AND  CHILD  NURTURE 

QUESTIONS   FOR  DISCUSSION 

1.  Bring  from  your  own  observation  illustrations  of  the  danger 
of  dealing  with  the  child  by  the  method  of  repression. 

2.  Give  illustrations  of  the  tactful  control  of  children  by  suggest- 
ing activities. 

3.  If  a  child  annoys  others  by  restlessness  in  church,  how  would 
you  correct  it.''  What  would  be  the  effect  of  giving  him  vigorous 
exercise  just  before  the  service.? 

4.  Rainy  days  are  particularly  trying  to  mothers  because  of  the 
noisy  play  of  children  who  are  kept  indoors.  What  suitable  activ- 
ities can  you  suggest  for  such  occasions? 

5.  Sunday  is  sometimes  a  dreaded  day  to  children  because  ordi- 
nary active  play  is  forbidden.  What  are  some  unobjectionable 
Sunday  activities? 

6.  How  would  you  answer  the  mother  who  says  she  has  not  time 
to  plan  things  for  her  children  to  do? 


22  ] 


TRAINING  THE   INSTINCTS 

Lesson  IV.     Dealing  with  the  Nervous 
Child 

The  problems  of  child  training  are  greatly 
increased  when  a  child  is  not  rested,  well  nour- 
ished, and  in  a  normal  condition  of  health.  When 
the  abnormal  conditions  are  slight  the  dangers 
in  moral  training  are  especially  great  because 
they  are  overlooked  in  the  average  case.  The 
following  readings  will  be  of  value  to  parents 
who  wish  to  understand  these  conditions  and  to 
know  how  to  deal  with  the  child  in  view  of  them. 
Nursery  Ethics^  by  Florence  Winterburn,  pp. 
170-173;  The  Care  and  Training  of  Children,  by 
Le  Grand  Kerr,  pp.  1 15-125;  The  Nervous  Sys- 
tem of  the  Child,  by  Francis  Warner,  pp.  180-184; 
The  Study  of  Children,  by  Francis  Warner,  pp. 
141-148. 

The  chief  means  of  preventing  exhaustion  lie  in  the 
early  recognition  of  the  signs  of  fatigue. 

—  Francis   Warner. 

When  the  body  is  in  a  morbid  condition  there  is 
not  present  sufficient  energy  to  make  one's  self  do  right. 
There  is  no  confidence,  no  faith,  and  an  effort  seems 
not  worth  the  while.  So  a  much  greater  degree  of 
tact  and  patience  are  necessary  in  dealing  with  ailing 
children  than  with  well  ones. 

—  Florence  Winterburn. 

The  adult  confides  to  his  friends  the  dread  which 
he  has  of  the  morrow  and  its  duties;  he  tells  of  uncon- 
trollable imaginations  of  error  or  wrong,  of  his  irrita- 
bility, which  he  always  attributes  to  his  not  feeling 
well,  and  a  hundred  and  one  complaints  of  which  he 
is,  to  his  view,  the  undeserving  victim.     But  the  child 

[23] 


CHILD  NATURE  AND   CHILD   NURTURE 

conceals  these  things;  he  is  irritable  and  fretful,  but 
he  makes  no  excuses;  he  may  exhibit  fits  of  passion  or 
wilfulness  that  are  unnatural  for  him;  ...  he  shows 
without  audible  complaint  that  there  is  something 
wrong. 

—  Le  Grand  Kerr. 


The  faults  of  children  are  often  in  large  measure 
due  to  their  physical  condition.  —  Most  mothers 
and  many  fathers  are  particularly  nervous  at 
times.  They  know  that  these  are  also  days  when 
their  children  are  unusually  cross,  but  many  fail 
to  realize  that  the  conditions  are  essentially  the 
same.  There  are  times  when  it  is  far  harder 
for  the  child  to  control  himself  than  it  is  for  the 
nervous  parent  to  do  it,  for  the  child  lacks  the 
understanding  of  his  own  case  and  the  developed 
powers  of  self-control  that  aid  the  adult.  Under 
such  circumstances  the  child  should  receive  patient 
and  thoughtful  treatment.  He  cannot  be  at  his 
best  at  such  times,  and  often  cannot  profit  by 
ordinary  methods  of  discipline. 

The  parent  should  be  watchful  for  such  occa- 
sions. —  Sometimes  the  condition  is  due  to 
fatigue.  An  evening  entertainment  that  delays 
the  hour  of  going  to  bed,  the  loss  of  the  usual 
afternoon  nap,  the  nervous  stimulation  of  an  unac- 
customed romp  with  other  children  —  these  and 
similar  unusual  circumstances  afTect  the  child 
much  more  strongly  than  many  parents  realize. 
Certain  more  usual  conditions  should  also  put  the 
parent  on  guard.  A  thoughtful  mother  said  to 
the  writer,  "  I  try  to  be  very  patient  with  my 
children  after  four  o'clock  in  the  afternoon,  for 
I  know  that  then  they  are  getting  tired."     Bur- 

[24] 


TRAINING  THE   INSTINCTS 

densome  school   tasks   sometimes   affect  children 
in  this  way. 

Besides  these  conditions  which  in  themselves 
suggest  the  danger,  there  are  others  which  should 
be  recognized.  Often  the  first  symptom  that  a 
child  is  "coming  down  with  the  measles"  or 
some  other  disease  is  his  unusual  irritability. 
After  the  nature  of  the  disease  has  appeared, 
many  a  parent  has  been  conscience-smitten  at 
the  thought  of  the  harsh  discipline  of  the  preced- 
ing day.  Bad  temper  in  a  usually  tractable 
child  should  always  suggest  the  possibility  of 
illness  as  an  explanation. 

In  such  cases  the  first  step  is  to  avoid  clashes 
of  will  between  parent  and  child.  —  This  does  not 
imply  that  the  child  is  to  be  allowed  to  have  his 
way  in  spite  of  the  better  judgment  of  the  parent, 
but  that  it  is  wise  tactfully  to  "manage"  him 
rather  than  to  resort  to  corrective  discipline. 
If  the  child  Is  not  in  such  physical  condition  as 
to  profit  by  such  measures  it  Is  better  to  avoid 
the  issue.  It  is  true,  however,  that  if  wise  re- 
tributive punishments  are  used  the  necessity  for 
this  is  minimized. 

This  immediate  step  should  be  promptly  fol- 
lowed by  an  eflfort  to  correct  the  unfortunate  con- 
ditions. —  Putting  the  child  to  bed,  telling  stories 
or  reading  to  him  as  a  substitute  for  active  play 
with  other  children,  calling  the  doctor,  keeping 
home  from  school,  or  such  other  methods  as  are 
suggested  by  the  needs  of  the  particular  case 
should  be  the  next  resort.  But  It  should  be 
understood  that  these  are  not  In  any  sense  to  be 
regarded  as  punishments.  To  send  an  over-tired 
and  nervous  child  to  bed  with  the  sting  of  unmcr- 

[25] 


CHILD  NATURE  AND  CHILD  NURTURE 

ited  punishment  in  his  heart  is  not  to  help  correct 
the  conditions  that  have  caused  the  trouble.  If 
the  child  is  in  a  really  normal  condition  the  case 
is  not  of  the  kind  that  is  here  discussed.  If  he 
is  not,  surely  the  treatment  should  be  directed 
to  the  cause  of  the  misconduct. 

QUESTIONS  FOR  DISCUSSION 

1.  Is  there  danger  to  discipline  in  avoiding  the  issue  in  case  of 
a  petulant  and  irritable  child  under  circumstances  such  as  have 
been  suggested  above? 

2.  What  would  you  say  of  the  danger  to  good  discipline  of  resort- 
ing to  punishment  under  such  circumstances? 

3.  Relate  from  your  own  observation  cases  in  which  children 
have  been  misunderstood  in  the  ways  hinted  at  in  the  lesson. 

4.  Have  you  used  methods  such  as  have  been  suggested  above? 
With  what  success? 

5.  Give  illustrations  of  tactful  ways  of  avoiding  the  issue  when  a 
child  is  not  in  a  condition  for  ordinary  discipline. 


[26] 


TRAINING  THE   INSTINCTS 


Lesson  V.     Teaching  the  Child  about 
Sex 

Few  duties  are  more  Important  or  more  dreaded 
by  parents  than  the  giving  of  Instruction  of  this 
kind.  In  the  past  It  has  been  almost  wholly 
neglected,  but  In  these  days  large  numbers  of 
parents  are  attempting  to  guard  their  children 
from  the  dangers  of  Ignorance  and  misinformation 
and  unclean  suggestion.  Among  many  books 
which  are  designed  to  aid  In  this  the  following 
titles  have  been  selected  as  among  the  very  best  as 
guides  to  parents  of  young  children.  The  Moral 
Problem  of  the  Children,  by  Rose  Wood-Allen 
Chapman  (published  by  The  Mary  Wood-Allen 
Fund,  6oi  W.  156  St.,  N.  Y.,  at  20  cts.);  What  a 
Young  Girl  Ought  to  Know,  by  Mary  Wood- 
Allen  and  Sylvanus  Stall;  What  a  Young  Boy 
Ought  to  Know,  by  Sylvanus  Stall.  (In  the  same 
series  with  the  last  two  are  books  for  young  people 
and  adults.) 

Why  Is  this  an  improper  subject?  Why  is  It  not 
as  sweet  and  clean  as  any  other.''  Why  is  not  birth  a 
holy  thing,  and  motherhood  and  fatherhood  an  equally 
holy  thing.''  Reverence  for  a  thing,  and  a  sense  of  its 
uncleanness  are  incompatible  feelings.  I  plead  for 
a  healthy,  natural  reverence  for  this  sacred  relation  of 
life  —  and  real  reverence  Is  based  only  on  knowledge 
and  understanding.  —  William  M.  Salter. 

The  great  work  that  we  are  to  do  for  our  children 
is  more  that  of  giving  them  the  right  atmosphere  than 
it  Is  simply  presenting  to  them  the  facts. 

—  Rose  Wood-Allen  Chapman. 

[27] 


CHILD  NATURE  AND  CHILD  NURTURE 

In  my  opinion  the  wisest  parents  will  .  .  .  teach 
"here  a  little  and  there  a  little"  while  the  child  is  not 
only  young,  but  very  young. 

—  Jennie  B.  Merrill. 

It  is  unsafe  to  leave  a  child  ignorant  about 
sex.  —  The  writer  firmly  believes  that  a  major- 
ity of  the  evils  that  appear  in  connection  with 
this  phase  of  human  nature  could  be  avoided  by 
simple,  frank  instruction  of  children  and  youth. 
The  great  trouble  has  been  that  parents  who  have 
clean  ideas  about  sex  and  its  relations  have  kept 
their  lips  sealed  on  the  subject,  and  have  left 
their  children  to  get  such  information  as  they 
could  from  other  children  and  ignorant  servants 
or  from  vicious  persons  who  are  always  ready  to 
talk  of  these  things.  Even  if  it  were  desirable, 
children  cannot  be  kept  in  ignorance  of  these 
things.  Through  the  parents'  neglect  their  thoughts 
of  these  matters  have  too  often  been  perverted 
and  impure  from  the  first.  The  aim  should  be 
to  preempt  the  ground  for  cleanness  and  truth. 

The  child's  natural  curiosity  opens  the  oppor- 
tunity to  give  such  instruction  in  a  healthful 
way.  —  The  invariable  questions  as  to  his  own 
origin  and  as  to  where  his  baby  brother  or  sister 
came  from  and  his  observation  of  pets,  domestic 
animals,  and  wild  creatures  about  the  home 
introduce  the  subject  in  the  ideal  way.  Thus  the 
essential  facts  about  the  origin  of  life  can  be  clearly 
given  at  a  time  and  in  a  way  that  cannot  pos- 
sibly offer  any  suggestion  of  impurity.  A  child 
who  is  so  taught  feels  as  he  grows  older  that  he 
has  always  known  these  things.  Nature's  ways 
seem  natural  to  him.     There  is  no  shock  of  reve- 

[28] 


TRAINING  THE   INSTINCTS 

latlon  at  a  time  when  It  is  unfortunate  that  his 
thought  should  be  strongly  directed  to  these 
things.  If  the  information  has  been  wisely 
given  his  ideas  have  been  pure  from  the  first  and 
they  are  not  easily  perverted.  On  the  other 
hand,  it  is  not  strange  that  children  go  wrong 
when  all  their  education  in  these  matters  has  pre- 
pared for  it. 

The  giving  of  such  instruction  is  the  parents' 
work.  —  The  peculiar  nature  of  the  task  makes 
this  appropriate.  Such  a  plan  makes  it  easy 
for  the  cultivation  of  modesty  to  parallel  the  giv- 
ing of  this  information;  this  can  be  the  child's 
secret  with  his  mother.  It  is  especially  desirable 
that  this  should  be  a  part  of  home  education 
because  the  child's  questions  arise  there  chiefly, 
and  so  it  makes  it  possible  for  him  to  receive 
the  instruction  while  his  curiosity  is  awake, 
and  to  receive  it  naturally  and  simply  rather 
than  by  a  formal  lesson.  It  is  especially  impor- 
tant because  it  opens  the  way  for  future  confi- 
dences when  the  child  meets  new  problems  and 
faces  new  dangers. 

Many  parents  shrink  from  this  duty  because 
they  do  not  know  how  the  information  should 
be  given.  It  can  be  safely,  delicately,  and  easily 
done.  There  are  many  recent  books  which  are 
especially  designed  to  aid  in  this.  It  is  earnestly 
recommended  that  parents  read  as  many  as  pos- 
sible of  the  references  that  are  given  above. 

Such  instruction  should  be  progressive.  — 
Only  such  information  should  be  given  to  the 
young  child  as  he  needs,  but  further  details  must 
be  given  when  curiosity  widens  and  new  dangers 
surround  the  growing  boy  or  girl.     A  number  of 

[29] 


CHILD  NATURE  AND  CHILD  NURTURE 

books  mentioned  above  suggest  in  detail  plans 
for  graded  instruction.  For  the  general  guidance 
of  the  parent  it  may  be  said  that  when  the  child 
wants  the  Information  Is  the  time  when  It  should 
be  given.  But  it  must  be  remembered  that  If 
the  parent  has  not  answered  the  child's  early 
questions,  those  that  arise  at  a  later  and  more 
critical  period  will  not  spontaneously  come  to 
the  parent,  but  to  those  who  have  secretly  satis- 
fied the  child's  curiosity  In  the  past.  A  parent 
who  Is  unwilling  to  open  the  matter  In  such  a 
case  can  at  least  put  a  carefully  chosen  book  In 
the  hands  of  the  youth  or  maiden. 

QUESTIONS  FOR  DISCUSSION 

1.  Judging  from  your  own  experience  as  a  child  and  from  your 
observation  as  an  adult,  do  you  think  it  is  safe  to  leave  a  child  unin- 
formed as  to  these  things? 

2.  Have  you  known  of  any  cases  in  which  parents  have  given 
such  instruction  to  their  children?     If  so,  what  were  the  results? 

3.  Do  you  know  the  attitude  of  children  in  the  public  schools  as 
to  these  things?     Is  it  healthful  and  normal? 

4.  If  not,  what  can  be  done  to  correct  the  conditions? 

5.  What  are  the  practical  difficulties  in  carrying  out  the  plans 
that  have  been  suggested? 

6.  What  are  the  best  books  on  this  subject  of  which  you  know? 


30 


IV 

HOW  TO  DEAL  WITH  THE  CHILD'S 
FEARS 

How  to  deal  wisely  with  the  many  fears  of 
children  is  one  of  the  most  important  problems 
of  child  training.  There  are  needless  fears  to 
be  corrected  and  at  times  useful  ones  to  be  stim- 
ulated. There  are  instinctive  fears  that  guard 
his  welfare  when  reason  does  not  tell  him  of 
danger,  and  fears  of  imagination  which  must 
be  understood  before  they  can  be  dispelled. 
There  is  danger  that  fear,  having  undue  place  in 
discipline,  may  intrude  itself  in  the  relations  of 
child  and  parent,  and  even  that  it  may  hold  the 
soul  aloof  from  the  God  whose  nature  is  love. 

Helpful  suggestions  as  to  the  various  ways 
in  which  the  parent  must  deal  with  fear  are 
found  in  the  following  books,  as  many  as  pos- 
sible of  which  should  be  consulted  in  connection 
with  Lessons  VI  to  IX:  Hints  on  Child  Training, 
by  H.  Clay  Trumbull,  pp.  223-239;  Household 
Education,  by  Harriet  Martineau,  pp.  109-119; 
Our  Children,  by  Paul  Carus,  pp.  178-189;  Child- 
hood, by  Mrs.  Theodore  Birney,  pp.  22-31;  Studies 
of  Childhood,  by  James  Sully,  pp.  191-227; 
Glimpses  of  Child  Nature,  by  Angelina  Wray, 
pp.  64-74;  f^^^'  Hs  Place  in  Human  N attire 
and  Methods  for  its  Culture,  by  Edward  P. 
St.  John,  The  Pilgrim  Teacher,  November,  19 10. 

[31] 


CHILD  NATURE  AND  CHILD  NURTURE 


Lesson  VI.     The  Meaning  of  the  Child's 
Fears 

Fear  is,  I  believe,  the  greatest  moral  suffering  of 
children.  —  George  Sand. 

Happy  those  little  ones  who  have  ever  near  them 
loving  arms  within  whose  magic  circle  the  oncoming 
of  the  cruel  fit  of  terror  is  instantly  checked,  giving 
place  to  a  delicious  calm.  How  unhappy  those  chil- 
dren must  be  who,  being  fearsome  by  nature,  lack 
this  refuge,  who  are  left  much  alone  to  wrestle  with 
their  horrors  as  best  they  may,  and  are  rudely  repulsed 
when  they  bear  their  heart-quaking  to  others. 

—  James  Sully. 

The  function  of  fear.  —  All  men,  and  all  animals 
except  the  very  lowest,  know  what  it  is  to  fear. 
Since  Nature  has  made  the  feeling  a  part  of  the 
universal  equipment  for  life  It  must  have  an 
Important  meaning  and  a  real  value.  A  very  little 
observation  and  thought  show  that  It  is  her  provi- 
sion for  the  welfare  of  a  creature  when  it  faces  a 
danger  that  It  cannot  overcome.  Impelled  by 
fear.  It  flees  and  so  finds  safety.  The  weaker 
animals,  because  they  are  not  so  well  equipped 
for  a  successful  struggle,  are  more  subject  to  fear. 
"As  timid  as  a  hare"  becomes  very  significant 
when  one  considers  how  defenseless  the  creature  Is. 

The  savage  with  his  poor  weapons  and  Ineffect- 
ive tools  Is  more  subject  to  fears  that  grow  out 
of  his  every-day  contact  with  nature  than  Is 
the  civilized  man.  So  woman,  because  she  Is  not 
so  well  fitted  to  battle  with  the  forces  of  nature  or 
with  evil-disposed  persons,  is  more  timid  than  man. 

[32] 


HOW  TO   DEAL   WITH   THE   CHILD'S   FEARS 

Why  the  child  is  so  fearful.  —  In  view  of  the 
function  of  fear  it  is  not  strange  that  the  little 
child  is  especially  subject  to  it.  Physically  he 
is  among  the  weakest  of  all  creatures.  Intel- 
lectually he  is  undeveloped,  and  hence  is  unable 
to  devise  methods  of  outwitting  his  enemies  or 
even  to  determine  the  limits  at  which  real  danger 
is  past.  As  he  grows  older  and  becomes  wiser 
and  stronger,  fear  has  less  value,  and  gradually 
it  comes  to  have  a  smaller  place  in  his  experience. 

When  one  realizes  how  valuable  the  child's 
fears  are  and  how  important  a  place  they  have 
in  God's  provision  for  his  welfare,  they  will  not 
be  regarded  lightly.  The  thoughtful  parent  will 
never  ignore,  ridicule,  rebuke,  or  despise  the  fears 
of  a  child. 

The  nature  of  fear.  —  Fear  belongs  to  the  emo- 
tional nature  of  the  child.  It  is  not  under  the 
power  of  his  will.  No  one  can  choose  to  fear 
or  not  to  fear  a  certain  experience  any  more  than 
he  can  arbitrarily  decide  that  he  will  love  or  hate 
a  particular  person  and  then  proceed  to  do  it. 
Fear,  like  every  other  feeling,  is  the  product 
of  certain  conditions.  When  one  believes  him- 
self to  be  in  danger,  fear  follows  of  necessity. 
Until  the  sense  of  danger  is  removed  the  fear 
cannot  pass.  This  may  be  accomplished  in 
dliTerent  ways;  the  threatening  object  may  dis- 
appear; one  whom  he  trusts  may  come  to  his 
rescue;  he  may  gain  further  knowledge  that 
Indicates  that  the  danger  Is  past;  but  In  some 
way  the  Impression  that  he  Is  about  to  receive 
an  injury  must  be  dispelled  before  the  fear  can 
be  dissipated. 

Hence  simply  to  urge  a  child  not  to  be  afraid 

[33] 


CHILD  NATURE  AND  CHILD  NURTURE 

is  useless;  to  command  It  is  folly;  to  punish  a 
child  for  fear  is  inhumanity.  The  first  step  toward 
the  conquering  of  a  child's  fears  is  to  remove  the 
danger  which  occasions  them,  or,  if  there  is  no 
real  danger,  to  convince  him  of  that  fact.  To 
force  him  into  association  with  that  which  he 
still  fears  is  to  increase  his  terror.  A  very  intense 
emotional  experience  of  that  kind  may  be  so 
deeply  registered  in  the  nervous  system  that  the 
feeling  persists  after  there  is  full  knowledge  that 
there  is  no  real  danger. 

QUESTIONS   FOR  DISCUSSION 

1.  Mention  some  of  the  foolish  fears  of  childhood  which  have 
come  under  your  own  observation.  Study  their  origin.  Were  they 
foolish  from  the  child's  point  of  view.? 

2.  When  a  boy  was  sent  for  the  first  time  to  have  his  hair  cut  at 
the  barber  shop  he  wept  bitterly  and  refused  to  go.  When  he  was 
asked  why  he  was  afraid  he  said,  "The  barber  will  pull  out  all  of  my 
hair!"  His  mother  asked  what  made  him  think  so,  and  he  re- 
plied, "Look  at  Uncle  Al's  head."  How  would  you  deal  with  such 
a  case? 

3.  A  father,  finding  that  his  boy  was  afraid  of  a  locomotive,  in 
order  to  demonstrate  that  it  would  not  harm  him,  dragged  him 
beside  one  as  it  stood  puffing  and  hissing  at  the  station.  The  child 
was  too  frightened  to  look  at  the  engine,  and  continually  struggled 
to  escape.  What  is  likely  to  be  the  result  of  such  an  experience 
upon  the  child's  tendency  to  fear  it.? 

4.  Aside  from  the  direct  influence  upon  the  child's  fear,  are  any 
unfortunate  results  to  be  expected.? 

5.  How  would  you  deal  with  such  a  case? 

6.  Give  from  your  reading  or  observation  illustrations  of  fears 
whose  real  significance  was  misunderstood  by  parents  or  teachers. 
Suggest  better  ways  of  dealing  with  these  cases. 


[34 


HOW  TO   DEAL   WITH  THE   CHILD'S   FEARS 

Lesson  VII.     How  to  Deal  with  Different 
Kinds  of  Fear 

Place  yourself  in  the  child's  place,  and  thence  start 
for  further  operations.  —  Paul  Carus. 

Until  a  child's  reasoning  faculties  are  developed 
through  contact  with  fact  and  experience,  the  odds 
are  tremendously  against  him  in  his  battle  with  fear, 
and  it  is  a  duty  wisely  and  tenderly  to  help  him  in 
this  as  in  other  processes  of  his  development. 

—  Mrs.  Theodore  Birney. 

The  hardest  fears  to  control  are  the  fears  that  are 
purely  of  the  imagination;  and  no  other  fears  call  for 
such  considerate  tenderness  of  treatment. 

—  H.  Clay  Trumbull. 

Instinctive  fears.  —  Certain  experiences  have 
been  so  universally  harmful  that  the  fear  of 
them  has  become  hereditary;  the  child  fears 
them  instinctively  before  he  has  had  experience 
of  them.  This  is  illustrated  in  the  fear  of  dark- 
ness, of  strangers,  of  loud  noises,  of  rapidly  mov- 
ing objects,  of  high  places,  etc.  All  of  these 
fears  were  directly  serviceable  to  our  savage 
ancestors,  and  even  in  our  own  social  environment 
they  are,  in  the  main,  of  real  value.  Thus  the 
fear  of  strangers  saves  the  child  from  some  real 
danger  of  contracting  contagious  and  infectious 
diseases,  and  lessens  the  danger  of  kidnapping 
which  is  not  wholly  to  be  ignored  even  in 
these  days.  The  fear  of  darkness  deters  the 
child  from  making  investigations  which  would 
lead  to  falling  down  the  cellar  stairs.  Loud 
noises    are    almost    invariably    accompanied    by 

I  35] 


CHILD  NATURE  AND  CHILD  NURTURE 

some  sudden  release  of  great  power.  These 
fears,  then,  are  not  to  be  eliminated,  but  only  to  be 
modified  in  relation  to  such  occasions  as  are  really 
harmless. 

Fears  based  upon  experience.  — These  are 
almost  always  serviceable.  The  exceptions  are 
when  the  combination  of  circumstances  is  unusual, 
or  when  the  child  has  blundered  in  his  own  rela- 
tion to  them.  Here  nature  is  most  effectively 
the  parent's  helper  in  the  training  of  the  child. 
Perhaps  the  commonest  mistake  in  relation  to 
them  is  in  unduly  shielding  the  child  from  the 
experiences  that  could  give  rise  to  these  helpful 
fears.  Some  wise  parents,  after  warning  the 
child  of  the  danger  of  playing  with  fire  and 
repeatedly  advising  against  it,  have  permitted 
him,  while  under  careful  observation,  to  have 
matches  that  he  might,  by  burning  his  fingers, 
learn  the  lesson  in  nature's  way.  A  prohibition 
after  such  an  experience  would  be  ten  times  as 
effective  as  it  could  be  if  natural  fear  of  the  real 
danger  were  not  enforcing  it. 

When  an  unfortunate  experience  causes  a 
needless  fear  it  may  be  corrected  by  explaining 
the  peculiar  circumstances,  by  showing  one's 
own  lack  of  fear,  and  by  gradually  leading  the 
child  into  association  with  the  dreaded  object 
under  favorable  conditions. 

Fears  due  to  misunderstanding  or  imagination. 
—  Such  are  dream  fears,  the  fear  of  ghosts  and 
other  supernatural  beings,  and  many  others  which 
are  due  to  children's  misinterpretations  of  the 
remarks  of  their  elders.  Because  of  their  igno- 
rance, children  are  especially  subject  to  these. 
The  parent  should  understand  that  however  triv- 

[36] 


HOW  TO  DEAL  WITH  THE   CHILD'S    FEARS 

ial  their  cause  from  the  adult  point  of  view  the 
child's  fears  are  as  real  as  If  the  danger  were  as 
great  as  he  supposes  it  to  be,  and  that  they 
deserve  as  thoughtful  and  patient  treatment  as 
any  others.  Often  the  misunderstanding  of  a 
single  unfamiliar  word  is  the  occasion  for  long- 
continued  suffering  on  the  part  of  a  child.  Thus 
a  child  who  had  been  taught  by  his  grandfather, 
who  was  a  clergyman,  to  repeat  the  verse,  "  The 
zeal  of  thy  house  has  eaten  me  up,"  believed  the 
church  to  be  inhabited  by  a  terrible  wild  beast. 
The  only  way  in  which  such  a  fear  can  be  removed 
Is  by  correcting  the  child's  misapprehension, 
whether  It  be  by  a  clear  explanation,  or  through 
the  gradual  attainment  of  knowledge  through 
the  child's  experience.  The  first  step  toward 
correcting  them  is  to  know  exactly  what  the 
child  fears,  and  how  the  fear  first  arose. 

QUESTIONS   FOR  DISCUSSION 

1.  If  you  believe  that  the  fear  of  darkness  has  some  real  value, 
what  would  you  do  about  having  the  child  sleep  in  a  dark  room? 

2.  Give  from  your  own  observation  cases  of  needless  fears  that 
were  the  product  of  experience.  How  would  you  deal  with  these 
cases? 

3.  Give  illustrations  of  fears  of  the  imagination.  How  would 
you  correct  them? 

4.  Illustrate  from  your  own  experience  fears  due  to  misunder- 
standing and  indicate  ways  of  dealing  with  these  particular  cases. 


37 


CHILD  NATURE  AND  CHILD  NURTURE 

Lesson  VIII.     The   Place   of   Fear   in 
Home   Discipline 

"The  child  heart  is  so  shy  a  thing;" 

It  opens  at  love's  tender  call. 

It  closes  when  fear's  shadows  fall. 
"The  child  heart  is  so  shy  a  thing." 

—  Angelina  W.  Wray. 

Anger  robs  obedience  of  its  sweetness. 

—  Elizabeth  Grinnell. 

Sternness  must  be  absolutely  avoided,  for  as  lying 
shows  fear,  anything  which  increases  this  sentiment 
only  drives  the  culprit  farther  from  the  truth. 

—  Florence  Hull  Winterburn. 

The  most  essential  thing  for  a  timid  infant  is  to 
have  an  absolutely  unfailing  refuge  in  its  mother. 

—  Harriet  Martineau, 

Fear  of  the  parent  is  not  an  effective  motive  of 
obedience.  —  Fear  has  at  best  only  a  negative 
value  in  moral  training.  The  most  that  it  can 
accomplish  Is  to  deter  the  child  from  wrong-doing. 
It  never  gives  him  a  positive  impulse  to  do  the 
right  as  love,  or  self-respect,  or  altruistic  feeling 
may  do.  While  it  may  secure  outward  obedi- 
ence It  may  leave  the  child  as  wrong  at  heart  as 
before. 

It  interferes  with  the  most  helpful  relations 
between  parent  and  child.  —  Fear  Is  the  feeling 
with  which  a  child  ordinarily  responds  to  an  enemy 
and  It  serves  to  lessen  the  possibility  of  any  asso- 
ciation between  them.  The  parent  surely  Is 
the  child's  best  human  friend,  and  the  normal  atti- 
tude of  love  between  them  Is  designed  to  bring 
them  Into  closest  association  that  the  child  may 

[38] 


HOW  TO   DEAL   WITH   THE   CHILD'S   FEARS 

profit  to  the  full  by  the  wisdom  and  strength 
and  self-sacrifice  of  the  father  and  the  mother. 
This  God-ordered  relation  between  parent  and 
child  is  by  far  the  strongest  influence  that  can 
be  brought  to  bear  upon  the  heart  and  life  of 
the  young.  Any  humanly  devised  mode  of  dis- 
cipline that  interferes  with  it  is  surely  a  misguided 
effort  for  the  child's  welfare. 

If  strongly  stimulated  it  leads  to  deception 
and  falsehood  on  the  part  of  the  child.  —  In  the 
young  child  this  is  due  to  the  fact  that  he  is  by 
nature's  plan  the  slave  of  his  instinctive  feelings. 
When  he  sees  a  parent's  stern  or  angry  face  and 
hears  the  harsh  voice,  his  fear  masters  him  so  that 
he  is  not  able  to  tell  the  truth.  The  same  instinct 
which  prompts  him  to  save  himself  from  a  harsh 
and  unloving  stranger  is  stirred  when  a  parent  so 
far  forgets  himself  as  to  manifest  anger  toward 
the  child. 

If  the  older  child  is  controlled  only  by  the  fear 
of  the  parent,  he  knows  that  if  he  can  deceive 
him,  he  can  escape  the  consequences  that  he 
dreads,  and  hence  deliberate  deception  is  common 
in  such  cases. 

But  the  child  should  fear  to  break  the  immu- 
table laws  of  God.  —  Whether  they  are  written 
in  the  Bible  or  whether  they  are  those  that  men 
have  discovered  in  other  ways,  and  call  laws  of 
nature,  or  laws  of  health,  or  moral  laws,  this  is 
true.  Faithfully  to  interpret  these  laws  to  a 
child,  and  wisely  to  punish  for  infraction  of  them, 
is  a  parent's  duty.  Indeed,  one  of  the  most 
important  lessons  that  a  child  ever  learns  is  that 
he  cannot  break  one  of  Cod's  laws  without  suf- 
fering because  of  it.     While  his  heart  should  go 

[39] 


CHILD  NATURE  AND  CHILD  NURTURE 

out  In  love  to  his  parent  and  to  God  he  must 
learn  to  fear  the  consequences  of  broken  law. 

QUESTIONS   FOR  DISCUSSION 

A  little  boy  had  been  forbidden  to  open  his  mother's  desk  lest  he 
spill  ink  upon  the  carpet.  In  a  moment  of  temptation  he  disobeyed, 
and  the  dreaded  accident  followed.  Bursting  into  tears,  he  ran  to 
his  mother's  arms,  saying,  "Oh,  mamma,  I  spilt  the  ink;  I  opened 
the  desk  and  spilt  the  ink!"  He  knew  that  he  had  disobeyed  and 
that  he  would  be  punished,  but  in  his  trouble  he  sought  his  mother 
first  of  all. 

1.  There  was  no  fear  of  the  mother.  Was  there  any  evidence 
of  an  unwise  mode  of  discipline.^ 

2.  Would  you  punish  a  cliild  under  such  circumstances.? 

3.  One  cannot  break  God's  laws  without  suffering  for  it.  Can 
the  parent  omit  punishment  in  such  a  case  without  danger  of  lessen- 
ing the  child's  appreciation  of  this  fact.'' 

4.  The  child  seemed  to  be  truly  repentant.  If  punishment 
which  seems  just  to  him  is  inflicted,  will  it  tend  to  increase  this  feel- 
ing or  to  weaken  it.''  If  the  punishment  is  omitted  might  the  feeling 
be  lost  more  easily.? 

5.  How  would  you  deal  with  a  child  who  lies  to  escape  punish- 
ment? 

6.  Describe,  for  discussion  in  the  class,  cases  of  discipline  which 
illustrate  the  suggestions  of  this  lesson  or  the  dangers  of  unwise 
stimulation  of  fear. 


[40] 


HOW  TO   DEAL  WITH  THE   CHILD'S   FEARS 


Lesson  IX.     The  Place  of  Fear  in  Religious 
Education 

The  fear  of  the  Lord  is  the  beginning  of  wisdom. 

—  Ps.   iii:io. 

Perfect  love  casteth  out  fear.  — i  John  4:  i8. 

What  time  I  am  afraid,  I  will  trust  in  thee. 

-Ps.  56:3. 

No  man  or  woman  can  be  a  faithful  servant  of 
duty,  qualified  to  live,  suffer,  and  die  for  it,  who  has 
not  grown  up  in  awe  of  something  higher  than  him- 
self, in  veneration  of  some  powers  greater  than  he  can 
understand;  and  this  awe  and  veneration  have  in  them 
a  large  element  of  fear  at  the  beginning. 

—  Harriet  Martineau. 

Fear  has  too  large  a  place  in  much  of  the  re- 
ligious training  of  the  child.  —  Some  theologians 
and  preachers  of  a  few  generations  ago  used  all 
the  resources  of  language  and  all  the  arts  of  ora- 
tory to  make  God  seem  terrible  to  men.  Great 
changes  have  come,  but  we  are  not  yet  wholly 
free  from  the  influence  of  those  who  would  scare 
children  into  the  kingdom  of  heaven.  Even  yet, 
to  some  children  the  dominant  conception  of  God 
is  that  of  the  cruel  judge  or  the  great  policeman 
in  the  sky  who  spends  his  time  in  trying  to  dis- 
cover the  sins  of  children  in  order  that  he  may 
punish  them  by  and  by.  Guu  is  the  child's  best 
friend;  fear  is  designed  to  save  the  child  from  an 
enemy.  The  attitudes  of  loving  trust  and  joy- 
ful obedience  are  those  that  will  bring  the  most 
helpful  relations  with  him.  The  parent  who 
teaches  his  child  to  shrink  from  the   thought  of 

[41] 


CHILD  NATURE  AND  CHILD  NURTURE 

the  presence  of  God  has  done  him  perhaps  the 
greatest  wrong  that  one  can  do  another  soul. 
We  may  well  hesitate  artificially  to  stimulate 
fear  of  Him  whose  very  nature  is  love. 

But  awe  stirred  by  God's  mighty  power  is  an 
element  in  the  reverential  attitude.  —  Reverence 
is  compounded  of  fear  and  love.  It  is  the  feeling 
that  rises  when  we  think  at  once  of  the  greatness 
and  the  goodness  of  God.  It  is  the  blending  of 
the  responses  to  the  impression  of  his  mighty 
power,  which  could  wipe  us  out  of  existence  in 
an  instant,  with  that  which  follows  the  thought  of 
his  love  and  care.  It  is  to  be  cultivated  not  so 
much  by  the  artificial  method  of  commanding 
the  hushed  voice  and  solemn  step  in  the  church 
as  by  bringing  to  the  child  the  thought  of  God's 
love  and  care  at  times  when  he  feels  dread  at 
some  manifestation  of  his  power  in  nature.  The 
moment  when  the  child  is  cowering  in  fear  in  the 
midst  of  a  storm  is  that  of  the  parent's  oppor- 
tunity. At  the  same  time  one  may  help  to  quiet 
his  fears  and  instil  that  attitude  of  reverential 
awe  which  really  comes  forth  from  his  inner 
nature,  and  will  find  expression  in  the  church, 
and  elsewhere  as  well. 

The  thought  of  the  presence  of  God  should 
serve  to  lessen  and  remove  many  of  the  child's 
fears. — An  illustration  will  best  present  the 
thought.  A  little  child  had  a  troubled  dream 
of  some  monster  that  came  from  the  dark  closet 
and  pursued  him  through  the  house.  Later, 
when  his  mother  found  him  fearing  that  this 
creature  haunted  the  dark  corners,  she  told  him 
of  God's  presence  and  his  loving  care,  and  went 
with   him   into   the   darkness   until   his   fear  was 

[42] 


HOW  TO   DEAL   WITH   THE   CHILD'S   FEARS 

so  quieted  that  he  could  stand  alone  in  the  open 
closet  door  and  say,  "I  am  not  afraid  because 
God  is  right  here,  and  he  is  taking  care  of  me  all 
the  time."  The  result  of  such  teaching  as  that 
will  be  that  whenever  the  child  feels  a  fear  his 
thoughts  will  trustfully  turn  to  God.  Compare 
the  result  with  that  of  such  teaching  as  leads 
the  child  to  think  of  him  with  terror  or  with 
dread. 

QUESTIONS  FOR  DISCUSSION 

1.  A  five-year-old  boy  of  the  writer's  acquaintance  liad  told  a 
lie.  His  godly  grandmother  pointed  to  the  crackling  fire  and  said, 
"  If  you  do  that,  by  and  by  God  will  put  you  in  a  place  like  this  and 
burn  you  up  forever."  What  is  likely  to  be  the  effect  of  such  train- 
ing.''    If  a  child  had  been  so  taught,  how  would  you  deal  with  him.^ 

2.  A  little  child  had  shown  great  fear  during  a  visit  to  Niagara 
Falls.  Some  time  afterward  he  asked  his  mother,  "Who  pours  the 
water  over  Niagara  Falls  .^"  How  would  you  answer  the  child  in 
such  a  case? 

3.  There  are  humorous  stories  that  indicate  otherwise,  but  from 
your  own  observation  are  not  the  fears  of  children  who  dread  to 
sleep  in  the  dark  lessened  by  the  thought  of  God's  presence!* 

4.  When  one  mother  tried  to  quiet  her  child  thus  she  became  more 
frightened  at  the  thought  of  God's  presence.  What  was  the  trouble.'' 
What  would  you  do  in  such  a  case.'' 

5.  A  mother  quieted  her  child's  fear  of  ghosts  by  saying:  "They 
are  angels.  If  they  ever  come  about  us  it  is  to  help  us.  They  only 
come  when  God  sends  them."  To  a  friend  she  justified  it  by  quot- 
ing Heb.  i:  14.     What  do  you  think  of  this."" 

6.  There  are  no  better  expressions  of  reverence  than  in  the 
Psalms.  Turn  to  the  29th,  the  93d,  and  the  i3Sth.  What  seems  to 
have  stirred  the  feeling  in  each  of  these  cases.? 

7.  Have  you  known  of  cases  where  children  have  seemed  to 
show  a  reverential  attitude  under  similar  circumstances.? 

8.  Mention  any  helpful  or  harmful  appeals  to  fear  in  religious 
instruction  of  children  which  have  come  to  your  notice. 


43 


V 

HOW  TO  DEAL  WITH  THE  ANGRY 
CHILD 

Anger  is  one  of  the  first  feelings  to  manifest  itself 
in  the  young  child.  It  is  one  of  the  most  unlovely 
traits  of  childhood,  and  one  of  the  most  difficult 
to  control.  But  it  is  also  true  that  the  one  who 
rarely  feels  it  often  suffers  wrong,  and  that, 
when  it  is  stirred  by  the  unjust  sufferings  of 
others,  it  impels  most  strongly  to  the  righting 
of  those  wrongs.  Manifestly  there  must  be 
thoughtful  action  on  the  parent's  part  if  the 
child  is  to  be  so  trained  that  he  will  experience 
anger  as  a  virtue  and  escape  it  as  a  vice. 

There  are  few  references  to  anger  in  the  popu- 
lar books  on  child  training,  probably  because  it 
is  commonly  regarded  as  wholly  wrong,  and  be- 
cause of  the  lack  of  successful  methods  for  its 
control.  The  following  readings,  however,  will 
be  helpful  in  connection  with  Lessons  X  to  XII: 
Hints  on  Early  Education  and  Nursery  Disci- 
pline (published  by  Funk  &  Wagnalls),  pp. 
33-36  (a  brief  reference,  but  particularly  good); 
Nursery  Ethics^  by  Florence  Hull  Winterburn, 
pp.  100-115;  Teachers'  Handbook  of  Psychology, 
by  James  Sully,  pp.  307-3 1 1 ;  Our  Children,  by 
Paul  Carus,  pp.  38-66;  Education  as  a  Science, 
by  Alexander  Bain,  pp.  72-77;  Psychology  in  the 

[44] 


HOW  TO  DEAL  WITH  THE  ANGRY  CHILD 

Schoolroom,  by  Dexter  and  Garlick,  pp.  218-225; 
Glimpses  of  Child  Nature,  by  Angelina  Wray, 
pp.  122-137;  As  the  Twig  is  Bent,  by  Susan 
Chenery,  pp.  78-88;  Ethics  for  Young  People,  by 
C.  C.  Everett,  pp.  106-109;  ^hat  Anger  Contrib- 
utes to  Character  and  the  Training  that  the  Impulse 
Needs,  by  Edward  P.  St.  John,  The  Pilgrim 
Teacher,  December,  1910. 


45 


CHILD  NATURE  AND  CHILD  NURTURE 

Lesson  X.     When  Anger  is  a  Virtue 

Be  ye  angry  and  sin  not.  —  Eph.  4:  26. 

The  one  who  has  never  felt  his  hands  clinch  and 
his  heart  beat  faster  at  the  sight  or  tale  of  injustice 
or  oppression  has  missed  something  in  his  education. 

—  Edward  P.  St.  John. 

Anger  is  a  natural  instinct  of  defense  by  which  one 
wards  off  or  punishes  injury  to  others,  or  to  one's 
self.  —  C.  C.  Everett. 

Anger  should  be  a  great  and  diffused  power  in  life, 
making  it  strenuous,  giving  zest  and  power  to  the 
struggle  for  survival,  and  rising  to  righteous  indigna- 
tion. —  G.  Stanley  Hall. 

Anger  is  apt  to  be  a  very  unjust  judge.  To  look  at 
an  act  through  an  angry  mood  is  like  looking  at  an 
object  through  a  magnifying  glass. 

—  C.  C.  Everett. 

The  value  of  anger  to  the  individual.  —  Fear 
serves  a  useful  purpose  because  it  prompts  one 
to  flee  from  harm,  but  it  always  involves  a  cer- 
tain loss;  life  is  saved  by  abandoning  one's  prop- 
erty or  one's  rights.  If  the  enemy  is  not  too  strong 
to  be  overcome,  anger  is  a  more  useful  response 
to  the  threatened  injury.  It  prompts  one  to 
defend  his  person,  his  property,  his  rights,  his 
reputation,  and  to  keep  at  a  distance  the  enemy 
whose  attitude  is  malicious.  When  the  conditions 
are  such  as  these,  anger  can  hardly  be  con- 
demned. In  cases  where  the  wrong  that  is  suf- 
fered is  relatively  slight  the  principle  is  the  same, 

[46] 


HOW  TO  DEAL  WITH  THE  ANGRY  CHILD 

though  the  response  should  of  course  be  propor- 
tioned to  the  occasion. 

How  anger  serves  others.  —  When  one  sees 
bitter  suffering  inflicted  upon  a  child  because  of 
the  selfishness  or  wanton  cruelty  of  an  adult 
there  can  be  but  one  response.  This  is  indigna- 
tion —  anger  stirred  by  the  wrongs  of  another. 
It  prompts  to  such  action  as  will  defend  the  suf- 
ferer and  tend  to  discourage  the  repetition  of  the 
misdeed.  This,  again,  is  surely  a  moral  impulse 
—  one  that  needs  to  be  wisely  and  justly  con- 
trolled, but  one  that  ought  not  to  be  wholly  elim- 
inated. Anger  because  of  the  needless  sufferings 
of  others  is  one  of  the  chief  incentives  in  worthy 
reform  movements  of  every  kind.  The  man 
whose  attitude  toward  the  forces  of  evil  that 
are  intrenched  in  our  social  system  is  that  of 
fear  rather  than  anger  is  neither  a  good  citizen 
nor  a  worthy  Christian. 

Anger  becomes  a  sin  when  its  function  is  per- 
verted. —  Its  legitimate  purpose  is  defense,  and 
only  to  the  extent  that  it  accomplishes  this 
is  it  of  value.  Ordinarily  the  degree  of  anger  is 
proportioned  to  the  sense  of  injury,  but  this  is 
not  always  true.  Anger  may  appear  with  insuffi- 
cient cause,  or,  to  put  it  in  another  way,  it  may 
be  stronger  than  the  occasion  demands.  That 
one  should  not  resent  an  unjust  attack  upon  his 
character  is  certainly  an  evidence  of  moral  weak- 
ness, but  to  shoot  a  man  for  calling  one  a  liar  is 
at  least  equally  conclusive  evidence.  Even  the 
unselfish  form  of  anger  is  subject  to  such  excess, 
as  the  savage  lynchings  of  criminals  in  commu- 
nities where  there  are  well  ordered  courts  of  jus- 
tice testify. 

[47] 


CHILD  NATURE  AND  CHILD  NURTURE 


QUESTIONS  FOR  DISCUSSION 

1.  Sometimes  the  hungry  baby  refuses  his  bottle.  _  If  it  is  repeat- 
edly offered  him,  he  begins  to  scream  in  rage.  What  is  usually  found 
to  be  the  occasion  for  this.?  Is  there  any  other  way  in  which  he  could 
have  protected  his  welfare.'' 

2.  Are  there  other  cases  in  which  anger  serves  a  useful  purpose 
in  the  every-day  life  of  the  infant?  Mention  such  as  you  have  ob- 
served. 

3.  Violent  anger  is  more  common  in  children  who  cannot  talk 
than  in  older  ones.  In  case  of  older  children  those  who  are  deaf 
and  dumb  are  more  given  to  violent  fits  of  passion  than  those  who  can 
talk.     Do  you  see  a  reason  for  this.'' 

4.  From  your  own  experience  give  illustrations  of  justifiable 
anger  in  children. 


[48] 


HOW   TO    DEAL   WITH   THE   ANGRY   CHILD 

Lesson   XL     How  to   Train  the   Anger 
Impulse 

He  whose  spirit  is  without  restraint 

Is  like  a  city  that  is  broken  down  and  without  walls. 

—  Proverbs  25:28. 

He  that  is  slow  to  anger  is  better  than  the  mighty. 

—  Proverbs  16:32. 

The  discretion  of  a  man  maketh  him  slow  to  anger. 

—  Proverbs  19:11. 

If  you  crush  the  fighting  instinct,  you  get  the  cow- 
ard; if  you  let  it  grow  wild,  you  get  the  bully;  if  you 
train  it,  you  have  the  strong,  self-controlled  man  of  will. 

—  Thomas  M.  Balliet. 

There  are,  perhaps,  some  rare  cases  where 
it  is  wise  to  stimulate  anger.  —  The  child  who 
makes  no  resistance  when  injury  is  inflicted  or 
threatened  is  poorly  equipped  for  life.  Such  a 
one  is  almost  sure  to  develop  a  weak  character 
which  makes  him  less  successful  as  an  individual 
and  less  useful  to  society.  But  nature  very 
rarely  fails  to  provide  the  child  with  well  devel- 
oped self-protective  feelings,  and  where  other  con- 
ditions appear  it  is  commonly  the  result  of  unwise 
repressive  training  by  the  parent. 

Violent  anger  in  the  young  child  should  not 
alarm  the  parent.  —  It  is  a  law  of  human  devel- 
opment that  the  feelings  of  the  young  child,  like 
those  of  the  lower  races  of  m.cn,  are  more  intense 
and  explosive  than  those  of  the  adult.  The 
mother  whose  child  throws  himself  upon  the  floor 
and  kicks  and  screams  in  blind  passion  until  he 
is  exhausted  should  understand  that  she  is  not 
dealing  with  a  degenerate,  but  with  a  child  who 

[49] 


CHILD  NATURE  AND  CHILD  NURTURE 

is  probably  normal  and  who  is  manifesting  very 
common  childish  impulses.  The  natural  tendency 
is  for  such  violent  passions  to  become  milder 
and  more  controlled  as  the  child  grows  older. 

The  anger  impulse,  like  every  other,  grows 
through  exercise.  —  The  more  frequently  it  is 
stimulated,  the  more  it  comes  to  dominate  the 
nature  of  the  child.  Even  the  disposition  of  a 
horse  or  a  dog  can  be  spoiled  by  continued  unkind 
treatment.  This  principle  is  one  of  the  most 
important  for  the  parent,  particularly  in  its 
relation  to  discipline.  Scolding,  and  especially 
"  nagging,"  is  almost  invariably  harmful  because 
it  commonly  stimulates  a  feeling  of  resentment 
and  general  irritation.  A  punishment  has  edu- 
cative value  only  when  it  stirs  a  feeling  of  regret 
or  repentance.  Whippings  and  ridicule  often 
have  a  very  different  effect  from  this.  Here, 
again,  the  value  of  the  retributive  punishment  is 
emphasized,  for  very  rarely  does  such  a  one  occa- 
sion any  feeling  of  resentment.  It  should  be  under- 
stood that  though  the  infliction  of  a  punishment 
causes  immediate  anger,  it  is  not  to  be  condemned 
if  the  later  consequences  are  such  as  to  cause  a 
permanent  regret  for  the  wrong-doing. 

The  ability  to  control  one's  anger  increases 
rapidly  at  adolescence.  —  Usually  at  about  four- 
teen to  sixteen  years  of  age  the  youth  begins  to 
win  real  and  frequent  victories  over  ill-temper. 
The  parent  can  greatly  aid  in  this  by  suggesting 
added  motives.  He  can  bring  illustrations  from 
literature,  and  from  life,  of  the  fact  that  one  who 
keeps  cool  when  he  resents  an  injury  has  a  great 
advantage  over  one  who  flies  into  a  rage.  Such 
motives   as   self-respect   and   Christian   duty   can 

[50] 


HOW   TO   DEAL   WITH   THE   ANGRY    CHILD 

be  stimulated.  The  more  refined  forms  of  anger, 
such  as  contempt  and  scorn,  in  which  the  one 
who  seeks  to  injure  another  is  regarded  as  so  far 
beneath  one  as  to  be  unworthy  of  notice,  can 
be  encouraged.  Perhaps  no  greater  service  can  be 
rendered  than  the  tactfully  expressed  apprecia- 
tion and  recognition  of  the  effort  for  self-mastery, 
however  slight  its  success  may  have  been. 

Altruistic  anger  should  be  wisely  cultivated.  — 
Whenever  anger  that  is  distinctly  unselfish  ap- 
appears  it  deserves  thoughtful  treatment.  That 
it  is  not  immoral  the  example  of  Jesus  testifies. 
The  spirit  should  be  encouraged,  but  in  such  a 
way  as  to  guard  against  excesses.  There  is  dan- 
ger that  men  to-day  will  needlessly  wish  to  call 
down  fire  from  heaven,  "Vengeance  is  mine;  I 
will  repay,"  is  a  message  that  is  frequently  needed. 

QUESTIONS   FOR  DISCUSSION 

1.  Are  the  exhortations  to  non-resistance  in  Matt.  5:38-41  to 
be  taken  literally,  or  to  be  interpreted  as  we  interpret:  "Take  no 
thought  for  the  morrow"?  f'H 

2.  A  mother  related  the  following  incident  to  the  writer.  Her 
son  came  home  from  school  much  disturbed  in  feeling.  By  persist- 
ent questioning  she  learned  that  he  had  been  repeatedly  annoyed  by 
a  schoolfellow,  who  had  that  afternoon  dared  him  to  fight.  The 
boy  had  replied  that  he  could  not  because  he  had  to  go  home  and  help 
his  mother  about  some  work,  and  had  gone,  followed  by  the  taunts 
and  gibes  of  his  enemy.  Upon  this  she  said:  "Mother  can  spare 
you  io'-  half  an  hour.  You  go  back  and  give  him  a  thrashing,  and," 
kissing  him,  "here's  one  to  do  it  well."  The  mother  finished  the 
story  by  saying,  "  He  did  it  well,  too.     He  broke  his  nose." 

VVhat  do  you  think  of  the  boy's  spirit.'  Of  the  mother's.^  Did 
the  outcome  of  the  affair  suggest  a  new  point  of  view.''  How  would 
you  deal  with  such  a  case.'' 

3.  A  friend  told  the  writer  of  a  boy  who  has. been  trained  to  abso- 
lute non-resistance,  with  the  result  that  at  eleven  years  of  age  he  is 
daily  escorted  to  and  from  school  by  his  mc^ther  or  a  maid  that  he 
may  not  be  imposed  upon  by  his  schoolmates.  Has  this  training 
furthered  or  hindered  his  real  welfare.' 

[SI] 


CHILD  NATURE  AND  CHILD  NURTURE 

Lesson   XII.     How  to   Deal  with   Fits 
OF  Passion 

Fathers,    provoke    not   your   children    to    anger. 

—  Col.  3:  21. 

Summary  punishment  for  the  passionate  outbursts 
of  children  is  simply  cruelty. 

—  Florence  Hull  Winterburn. 

Speak  to  a  child  in  a  fretful  manner  and  we  shall 
generally  find  that  his  manner  partakes  of  the  same 
character.  —  Harriet  Martineau. 

If  too  repressed,  righteous  indignation  may  turn  to 
sourness  and  sulks.  —  G.  Stanley  Hall. 

We  must  take  care  that  children  with  a  strong  ten- 
dency to  violent  temper  should  not  be  exposed  to 
circumstances  likely  to  inflame  their  passions. 

—  James  Sully. 

We  cannot  reason  with  a  young  child  but  we  can 
use  our  own  reason  for  him. 

—  Florence  Hull  Winterburn. 

The  problem  is  partly  different  from  that  of 
educating  the  anger  instinct.  —  Whatever  course 
of  conduct  is  desirable  for  the  child's  own  wel- 
fare, the  interests  of  others  must  also  be  consid- 
ered. Fits  of  violent  rage  sometimes  occur  and 
the  situation  must  be  dealt  with  promptly.  Such 
considerations  will  sometimes  determine  the  mode 
of  action,  but  the  methods  used  should  not  be 
such  as  would  be  seriously  objectionable  from  the 
educational  point  of  view. 

The  best  efforts  of  the  parent  are  preventive.  — 
Many  a  wife    has    learned   to   ask  favors  of  her 

[52] 


HOW  TO  DEAL  WITH  THE  ANGRY  CHILD 

husband  after  a  good  meal  rather  than  before 
it  —  unless,  indeed,  he  is  a  dyspeptic.  Some  hus- 
bands plan  to  avoid  certain  topics  on  days  when 
their  wives  are  especially  nervous.  Why  should 
not  both  use  equal  tact  in  dealing  with  a  child.'' 
Care  as  to  the  temperature  of  the  bath,  the  avoid- 
ance of  haste  in  combing  the  hair,  discourage- 
ment of  association  with  certain  children  —  these 
and  many  other  similar  steps  which  will  occur 
to  the  thoughtful  parent  will  help  to  smooth 
the  path  of  domestic  discipline,  and  at  the  same 
time  aid  the  child  to  free  himself  from  the  slavery 
to  passion.  Careful  consideration  of  the  child's 
condition  of  health  will  point  to  times  when  espe- 
cial care  should  be  used.  On  the  other  hand 
the  child's  irritability  is  often  the  first  symptom 
of  incipient  measles  or  other  disease  of  childhood. 
Any  treatment  that  increases  anger  should 
be  avoided. — The  suggestions  in  regard  to  pun- 
ishment in  the  last  lesson  are  especially  pertinent 
here.  Whipping,  scolding,  shaking,  are  wholly 
wrong  as  a  punishment  for  anger,  however  justifi- 
able they  may  seem  at  other  times.  Separating 
an  angry  child  from  his  playmates  is  often  helpful, 
but  when  he  kicks  and  pounds  upon  the  door  of 
his  prison  or  sits  in  the  corner  and  sulks  it  is  quite 
otherwise.  This  does  not  mean  that  because 
little  Willie  has  a  temper  he  must  have  his  own 
way.  Quite  the  contrary.  When  one  is  assured 
that  there  is  no  legitimate  occasion  for  anger, 
the  very  best  treatment,  when  it  is  possible,  is 
wholly  to  ignore  the  child  until  his  rage  has  passed. 
Some  mothers  have  said  to  such  a  child:  "  I  can- 
not talk  of  those  things  with  this  angry  child. 
When  my  own  good  boy  comes  back  we  will  talk 

[53] 


CHILD  NATURE  AND  CHILD  NURTURE 

it  over."  "A  soft  answer  turneth  away  wrath." 
Sometimes  no  answer  at  all  is  better  still. 

Diversion  of  the  child's  thought  will  sometimes 
prevent  a  fit  of  anger.  —  To  attempt  to  reason 
with  a  thoroughly  angry  person,  old  or  young, 
is  but  to  add  fuel  to  the  fire.  He  is  not  a  reason- 
able person.  He  is  "mad,"  as  we  say.  At  the 
beginning  of  such  an  experience  an  adult  or  a 
youth  may  often  be  influenced.  A  similar  effect 
may  often  be  secured  in  the  child  by  quickly 
turning  his  thought  to  a  wholly  different  matter. 
Thus  the  removal  of  a  coveted  object,  the  sug- 
gestion of  a  new  game  in  which  there  is  no  dis- 
puted position  of  leadership,  a  call  to  render  some 
little  service,  or  the  suggestion  of  a  story  at  the 
critical  moment  will  often  save  a  quarrel. 

With  some  hesitation,  lest  it  be  misunderstood 
or  misapplied,  another  prescription  is  offered. 
Sometimes,  when  a  child  is  in  the  midst  of  one  of 
those  distressing  outbursts  of  rage,  he  may  be 
brought  out  of  it  by  an  unexpected  dash  of  water 
in  his  face.  This  is  not  a  punishment  In  any  sense. 
Its  efi"ect  is  to  substitute  intense  surprise,  with 
perhaps  a  small  element  of  fear,  for  the  anger. 
The  physical  shock  is  enough  to  do  this,  and  in 
ordinary  cases  is  far  less  harmful  than  prolonged 
anger.  It  is  the  method  of  diversion  applied  in 
a  heroic  way.  Usually  by  the  time  the  water 
is  wiped  from  eyes  and  face  the  child  rushes  to 
his  mother's  arms  and,  after  a  few  tears,  falls  asleep. 

A  certain  measure  of  expression  of  one's  sense 
of  wrong  helps  to  end  the  resentment.  —  Anger 
that  is  suppressed  tends  to  smolder  and  at  length 
bursts  forth  more  fiercely.  To  make  a  confidant 
of  a  friend  eases  one's  feelings.     Hence  the  par- 

[54] 


HOW  TO  DEAL  WITH  THE  ANGRY  CHILD 

ent  should  never  refuse  to  hear  the  child's  side  of 
the  quarrel.  Simply  telling  of  it  tends  to  relieve 
the  situation.  Confession  is  good  for  the  soul 
and  there  are  no  dangers  in  this  kind  of  confes- 
sional. 

QUESTIONS   FOR  DISCUSSION 

1.  Where  do  children  get  their  tempers?     Are  they  responsible 
for  them? 

2.  What  shall  be  done  when  a  child  from  another  family  flies 
into  a  passion  while  playing  with  children  in  the  home? 

3.  How  would  you  deal  with  the  child  who  manifestly  "works 
up"  a  fit  of  anger? 

4.  Are  young  children   really  able   to  control   their  anger?     If 
not,  should  they  ever  be  punished  for  it? 

5.  Has  the  regulation  of  sleep,  food,  and  exercise  any  influence 
upon  the  temper  of  an  irascible  child? 

6.  Would  the  shock  of  a  stinging  slap  on  the  hand  be  as  effect- 
ive as  the  cold-water  treatment  mentioned  in  the  lesson?     Why? 


55 


VI 
THE  TRAINING  OF  THE  LOVE  IMPULSE 

Among  all  the  feelings  that  find  expression  in 
child  life  none  is  more  beautiful  than  love;  among 
all  the  motives  that  govern  human  conduct  no 
impulse  is  more  powerful.  "Love  is  strong  as 
death."  In  religion  it  has  the  supreme  place. 
Love  to  God  and  love  to  neighbor  are  at  the  core 
of  every  message  of  Jesus. 

All  the  worthy  books  on  child  training  assume 
or  imply  its  importance;  very  few,  indeed,  defi- 
nitely discuss  it.  The  first  two  of  the  references 
mentioned  below  are  of  especial  value.  The 
others  throw  added  light  upon  its  place  in  charac- 
ter and  the  methods  for  its  culture.  All  should, 
if  possible,  be  carefully  read  in  connection  with 
Lessons  XVII  and  XVIII.  A  Study  of  Child  Na- 
ture, by  Elizabeth  Harrison,  pp.  75-89;  Household 
Education,  by  Harriet  Martineau,  pp.  156-168; 
Hints  on  Child  Training,  by  H.  Clay  Trum- 
bull, pp.  263-274;  Child  Culture  in  the  Home,  by 
Martha  B.  Mosher,  pp.  11-21;  As  the  Twig  is 
Bent,  by  Susan  Chenery,  pp.  44-51. 


[56] 


THE  TRAINING  OF  THE   LOVE   IMPULSE 

Lesson  XIII.     The  Nature  of  Love  and  the 
Uses  that  it  Serves 

We  love,  because  he  first  loved  us. 

—  I  John  4  :  19. 

If  a  man  love  me,  he  will  keep  my  words. 

—  John  14:  23. 

He  that  loveth  not  knoweth  not  God;  for  God  is 
love.  —  I  John  4  :  8. 

The  relationship  established  between  parent  and 
child  is  apt  to  become,  in  time,  the  relationship  between 
the  soul  and  God.  —  Elizabeth  Harrison. 

With  the  first  dawning  smile  upon  the  infant's 
face  the  instinct  of  love  awakes.  Until  the  last  sacri- 
fice of  life  itself  for  the  loved  object  —  aye,  on  up  to 
that  sublime  exaltation  which  can  say  "even  though 
He  slay  me,  yet  will  I  trust  Him,"  love  is  the  great 
motive  power  which  enriches  and  ennobles  life. 

—  Elizabeth  Harrison. 

For  life,  with  all  it  yields  of  joy  and  woe 
And  hope  and  fear  (believe  this  aged  friend). 
Is  just  our  chance  o'  the  prize  of  learning  love, 
How  love  might  be,  hath  been,  indeed,  and  is. 

—  Robert  Browning. 

There  are  two  distinct  kinds  of  feeling  that 
are  known  as  love. — One  of  these  is  the  response 
to  benefits  received,  and  promotes  the  welfare 
of  the  one  who  loves.  Such  is  the  love  of  the 
little  child  for  its  parent  or  for  the  older  friend 
who  contributes  to  his  happiness,  and  such  is 
the  love  of  the  Christian  for  God.  The  other  is 
the  love  of  God  for  men,  the  love  of  the  parent 

[57] 


CHILD  NATURE  AND  CHILD  NURTURE 

for  the  child,  the  love  of  the  Christian  for  his 
fellow.  This  love  seeks  the  welfare  of  the  one 
who  is  loved.  It  often  leads  to  self-sacrifice,  to 
the  disregard  of  the  interests  of  the  one  who  is 
experiencing  the  feeling.  Because  these  two  kinds 
of  feeling  are  quite  similar  in  their  manifestations 
they  are  commonly  confused,  but  if  the  different 
purposes  that  they  serve  are  kept  in  mind  the 
distinction  can  easily  be  made.  They  appear 
side  by  side  in  Jesus'  summary  of  the  law.  It 
is  the  first  of  them  that  is  to  be  considered  in  this 
lesson. 

The  origin  of  love  is  in  the  consciousness  of 
benefits  received.  —  Love  is  the  response  to  love. 
The  little  child  loves  his  mother  most  of  all  be- 
cause he  owes  most  of  his  happiness  to  her.  If 
she  leaves  him  to  the  care  of  a  servant,  that  love 
goes  out  to  the  nurse.  By  and  by  comes  the  time 
when  another  woman  can  give  him  more  of  happi- 
ness than  the  most  devoted  mother  can,  and  so 
he  leaves  his  parents  and  cleaves  to  her.  Our 
friends  —  the  ones  who  are  most  truly  such  — 
are  those  who  by  their  personalities  bring  most 
of  pleasure  into  our  lives.  Patriotism  is  love 
of  country  based  upon  the  benefits  and  pleasures 
that  we  owe  to  fatherland.  Gratitude  is  love 
because  of  benefits  received  in  the  past.  Trust 
is  love  that  expects  in  the  future  the  goodness 
that  has  been  manifested  in  the  past. 

The  function  of  love  is  to  lead  the  one  who 
loves  into  right  relations  with  all  friendly  beings 
who  may  contribute  to  his  welfare.  —  It  is  the 
result  of  some  helpful  relationship,  and  its  purpose 
is  to  prolong  it  and  to  make  it  more  likely  to  occur 
again.     Though  this  is  nature's  aim,  the  one  who 

[58] 


THE  TRAINING  OF  THE   LOVE   IMPULSE 

loves  is  not  conscious  of  it.  He  simply  seeks  the 
pleasure  that  comes  through  the  satisfaction  of 
the  impulse.  When  one  considers  the  results  of 
his  conduct,  however,  its  meaning  is  very  clear. 
Love  for  another  prompts  to  imitation,  and  obe- 
dience, and  conformity  to  his  will.  In  this  way 
the  child's  affection  for  his  parents  saves  him  from 
countless  dangers.  It  is  one  of  the  very  strong- 
est restraining  influences  in  time  of  conscious 
temptation  as  well  as  at  many  other  times  when 
he  has  no  thought  of  danger.  In  the  Christian's 
attitude  toward  God  it  is  a  far  safer  and  stronger 
preventive  of  sin  than  the  fear  of  punishment 
could  possibly  be. 

Love  for  God,  parents,  or  teacher  is  an  espe- 
cially strong  motive  because  it  directly  prompts  the 
child  to  the  conduct  that  is  desired.  —  Fear  may 
deter  him  from  wrong-doing,  but  cannot  give  him 
this  positive  help.  Desire  for  a  reward  is  less 
direct  and  may  lead  to  deception.  The  desire 
for  praise  or  admiration  involves  the  same  dan- 
ger. Genuine  love  must  bring  the  true  response 
of  the  heart  and  life.  Love  is  the  fulfilling  of 
the  law  because  it  implies  both  the  deed  and  the 
spirit  back  of  the  deed. 

QUESTIONS  FOR  DISCUSSION 

1.  The  young  child  lives  his  life  chiefly  on  the  physical  plane. 
Can  the  mother  who  leaves  the  satisfaction  of  his  physical  wants 
entirely  to  servants  have  his  love?     If  so,  how  may  it  be  won? 

2.  How  may  a  mother's  play  with  her  child,  and  other  efforts 
simply  to  give  him  pleasure,  directly  influence  the  child's  readiness 
to  obey? 

3.  What  kind  of  punishments  are  least   likely  to  interfere  with 
the  affectionate  attitude  of  the  child  toward  the  parent?     Illustrate. 
4.    Carefully  recall  times  when  your  children  have  seemed  unlov- 
ing.    Try  to  determine  reasons  for  it.     Could  this  have  been  avoided 

[59] 


CHILD  NATURE  AND  CHILD  NURTURE 

without  injury  to  the  child?     If  you  can,  report  such  cases  to  the 
class. 

5.  Can  sarcasm  and  ridicule  ever  fail  to  interfere  with  loving 
relationships? 

6.  Ask  your  children  if  they  really  love  God,  and,  if  so,  why. 
Try  to  get  at  the  facts  and  discover  the  reason  for  their  attitude, 
whatever  it  is.     Report  the  results  to  the  class. 


[60] 


THE  TRAINING  OF  THE   LOVE   IMPULSE 


Lesson  XIV.    Training  the  Child  to  Love 

Even  the  child's  love  can  decay  if  not  nourished 
carefully.  —  Friedrich  Froebel. 

All  exercises  which  awaken  the  active  powers, 
which  form  the  capacity  for  rendering  loving  service 
to  fellow-creatures,  will  help  to  lay  the  groundwork 
of  religion  in  the  child. 

—  Madam  Marenholtz-Bulow. 

He  that  loveth  not  his  brother  whom  he  hath  seen, 
cannot  love  God  whom  he  hath  not  seen. 

—  I  John  4:  20. 

My  little  children,  let  us  not  love  in  word,  neither 
with  the  tongue;  but  in  deed  and  truth. 

—  I  John  3:  18. 

There  is  a  physical  love  which  expresses  itself  in 
the  mere  kiss  and  hug  and  word  of  endearment  .  .  . 
it  is  but  the  door  or  entrance  to  that  other  higher 
form  of  love  which  manifests  itself  in  service  and  self- 
sacrifice.  —  Elizabeth  Harrison. 

And  this  is  love,  that  we  should  walk  after  His  com- 
mandments. —  2  John  6. 

The  first  step  in  the  culture  of  love  is  to  provide 
for  proper  stimulus.  —  The  atmosphere  of  love 
must  surround  the  child.  Parental  aflFection  is 
usually  sufficient  to  secure  this.  Indeed,  no 
reasoned  procedure  can  ever  direct  as  surely  or 
impel  as  strongly  as  the  w^ell  developed  natural 
instincts  of  motherhood.  But  when  to  the  fer- 
vor of  the  heart  is  added  the  guidance  of  an  under- 
standing mind,  the  ideal  has  been  reached.  The 
thought  of  what  the  effect  upon  a  child's  charac- 

f6il 


CHILD  NATURE  AND  CHILD  NURTURE 

ter  may  be  will  sometimes  help  a  tired  mother 
to  the  exercise  of  patience  and  self-denial  under 
trying  circumstances. 

The  child's  love  must  be  stirred  by  childish 
pleasures.  —  For  the  young  child  these  are  usu- 
ally of  a  sensuous  kind.  Food,  warmth,  soft 
clothing,  the  gentle  touch  of  the  caress,  the  lul- 
laby that  soothes  to  rest,  play  that  provides 
healthful  exercise  for  the  growing  muscles  and 
budding  mental  powers  —  these  are  the  things 
that  awaken  a  response  in  his  undeveloped  and 
as  yet  self-centered  heart.  Later,  the  gift  that 
introduces  him  to  new  joys  aids  In  carrying  out 
his  own  plans  of  childish  play,  the  sympathy  that 
salves  his  hurts  of  body  and  of  mind,  the  story 
that  through  the  experiences  of  another  leads 
him  into  new  worlds  of  delight,  have  their  places, 
and  In  turn  prepare  the  way  for  the  changes 
that  make  it  the  parents'  part  to  bind  still  closer 
the  heart  of  the  child  by  fullest  sympathy  with 
those  new  interests  and  ties  that  lead  him  farthest 
from  their  sides.  It  is  as  the  parent  helps  the  child 
to  find  happiness  —  his  own  true  satisfaction, 
however  crude  it  may  appear  to  an  adult  —  that 
love  is  stirred.  Immediate  gratification  sometimes 
must  be  denied  as  a  means  to  greater  pleasures, 
but  this  will  bring  in  time  its  fruitage  of  deepened 
affection. 

Unless  the  child's  love  is  led  to  its  right  expres- 
sion a  selfish  spirit  may  result  from  such  treat- 
ment.—  The  last  paragraph  has  suggested  to 
some  the  question.  Is  it  not  love  of  self  that  would 
be  fostered  in  the  child.'*  Unless  he  is  led  to  some 
expression  of  his  pleasure  beyond  the  word  and 
the  caress,  the  danger  is  certainly  real.     But  on 

[62I 


THE  TRAINING  OF  THE   LOVE   IMPULSE 

the  other  hand  it  must  be  remembered  that  unself- 
ishness is  not  fostered  by  denying  a  child  pleas- 
ures against  his  will.  We  must  keep  in  mind 
the  fact  that  the  normal  expression  of  love  of  the 
kind  that  we  have  in  mind  is  found  in  closest 
association  with  and  obedience  to  the  one  who  is 
loved.  The  important  method,  then,  is  to  lead 
love  to  manifestation  in  the  unselfish  deed.  Love 
grows  with  its  expression  if  that  expression  is  the 
full  and  normal  one. 

The  training  must  be  begun  when  the  child 
is  in  the  loving  mood.  —  Sometimes  the  young 
child  refuses  obedience,  or  denies  the  request  of 
the  parent,  or  even  declares  that  he  does  not 
love  him.  It  is  useless  to  try  to  secure  the  ex- 
pression of  love  when  it  is  not  in  the  heart.  With 
such  a  child  it  is  when  the  caress  or  the  loving 
word  is  offered,  that  the  opportunity  comes. 
When  it  is  offered,  the  parent  should  make  the 
most  of  it.  Especially,  the  proffered  service  of 
a  child  which  is  prompted  by  a  loving  heart 
should  never  be  thoughtlessly  refused. 

Love  for  God  is  to  be  fostered  and  developed 
in  the  same  way.  —  First  of  all  the  child  must 
associate  God  with  his  real  pleasures.  To  a  child 
the  promise  of  heaven  or  of  spiritual  blessings 
makes  small  appeal.  But  he  can  really  thank 
God  for  the  joys  of  springtime  and  summer 
and  autumn  and  winter;  for  flowers  and  birds,  and 
fruits  and  nuts,  and  winter  snows.  He  can  respond 
to  the  thought  of  God's  care  of  him  in  the  dreaded 
wakeful  hours  of  night,  or  when  at  dusk  he 
passes  through  the  lonely  wood.  As  youth  comes 
on  his  heart  will  go  out  to  the  Saviour  who  is 
touched  with  the  feeling  of  our  infirmities,  and 

[63] 


CHILD  NATURE  AND  CHILD  NURTURE 

when  the  need  comes  he  will  turn  to  the  God  of 
all  comfort  in  his  sorrows.  The  great  lesson  to 
be  learned  is  that  love  is  never  aroused  by  argu- 
ment or  by  the  claim  of  duty,  and  that  it  cannot 
fail  to  be  stirred  when  there  is  revealed  a  love 
which  ministers  to  present  happiness. 

QUESTIONS   FOR  DISCUSSION 

1.  Is  picking  up  a  nine-year-old  child's  toys,  caring  for  school- 
book  and  rubbers,  and  relieving  a  child  from  all  responsibility  for 
the  care  of  her  room,  etc.,  the  right  way  to  stir  love  for  the  mother 
in  a  child's  heart? 

2.  A  mother  said  to  the  writer:  "When  my  daughter  was  a  child 
I  lived  for  her.  Now  she  is  sixteen  years  old,  and  she  is  unwilling 
to  assist  in  the  simplest  duties  of  the  home.  Why  is  she  so  selfish.'"' 
Can  you  suggest  an  explanation  which  is  based  upon  the  mother's 
own  account  of  the  conditions.^ 

3.  What  shall  a  mother  do  when  a  young  child  comes  with  a 
broom  "to  help  mother"  and  sweeps  the  dust. the  wrong  way.''  Or 
when  she  offers  to  wipe  the  costly  china  or  dust  the  bric-a-brac' 

4.  In  answer  to  the  catechism  question,  "Why  should  we  love 
and  honor  God.'"'  a  boy  said,  "Because  he  made  cranberry  sauce 
and  redeemed  me."  The  printed  answer  was,  "Because  he  made, 
preserves,  and  redeemed  me."  The  reason  for  the  mistake  is  appar- 
ent, but  what  bearing  has  the  answer  upon  the  problem  of  how  to 
lead  the  child  to  love  God? 


64] 


VII 


TRAINING  THE   CHILD   IN  UNSELFISH- 
NESS AND  KINDNESS 

The  love  of  neighbor  as  of  self  is  one  of  the  two 
fundamental  requirements  of  Jesus'  summary  of 
the  law.  In  his  general  teachings  it  was  at  least 
equally  emphasized  with  the  other.  The  atti- 
tude of  helpfulness  toward  others  is  at  the  founda- 
tion of  our  whole  conception  of  morality.  But 
while  the  effort  of  moral  education  centers  very 
largely  about  the  culture  of  these  feelings,  it  has 
not  been  commonly  realized  that  there  is  a  defi- 
nite feeling  that  prompts  man  to  unselfishness  and 
helpfulness  in  his  relations  with  others  and  that 
it  is  as  capable  of  definite  training  as  are  fear  or 
anger  or  any  other  of  the  feelings. 

Perhaps  for  this  reason  most  of  the  books  on 
child-training  neglect  definite  discussion  of  it, 
and  touch  upon  it  incidentally  in  connection  with 
other  topics.  Among  the  most  helpful  readings 
for  the  use  of  parents  that  are  readily  accessible 
are  the  following,  which  should  be  read  in  con- 
nection with  Lessons  XIX  to  XXII:  Children's 
Rights,  by  Kate  Douglas  Wiggin,  pp.  171-186; 
Love  and  Law  in  Child  Training,  by  Emilie 
Poulsson,  pp.  152-158;  How  John  and  I  Brought 
Up  the  Child,  by  E.  Grinnell,  pp.  53-65;  The 
Natural  Way,  by  Patterson  Du  Bois,  pp.  164- 
[65] 


CHILD  NATURE  AND  CHILD  NURTURE 

173;  As  the  Twig  is  Bent,  by  Susan  Chenery,  pp. 
21-31;  Mothers  and  Sons,  by  E.  Lyttleton,  pp. 
61-69;  Hints  on  Early  Education  (published  by 
Funk  and  Wagnalls),  pp.  39-43;  The  Moral  In- 
struction of  Children,  by  Felix  Adler,  pp.  218- 
232;  Studies  of  Childhood,  by  James  Sully,  pp. 
228-251. 


66] 


A 


LITTLE  Mother 


TRAINING  OF  THE   CHILD 


Lesson  XV.    The  Nature  of  Altruistic 
Feeling 

Look  not  every  man  on  his  own  things,  but  every 
man  also  on  the  things  of  others.  —  Phil.  2:  4. 

Bear  ye  one  another's  burdens,  and  so  fulfil  the  law 
of  Christ.  — Gal.  6:  2. 

If  ye  do  good  to  them  which  do  good  to  you,  what 
thank  have  ye^  for  sinners  also  do  even  the  same. 

—  Luke  6:  33. 

"When  the  child  pulls  the  cat's  tail,"  so  runs  the 
word,  "don't  tell  him  that  the  reason  he  mustn't 
pull  it  is  that  the  cat  would  scratch  him,  but  tell  him 
that  he  mustn't  pull  it  because  he  would  hurt  the 
cat."  —  Emilie  Poulsson. 

All  actions  that  are  unselfishly  directed  to  the 
helping  of  others,  the  relieving  of  their  wants, 
the  lessening  of  their  pains  and  sorrows,  are 
prompted  by  one  kind  of  feeling  which  is  as  dis- 
tinct as  anger  or  fear. — This  is  called  "altru- 
istic feeling"  that  it  may  be  clearly  distinguished 
from  other  impulses.  As  was  pointed  out  in  Les- 
son XIII,  it  is  commonly  called  "love,"  though 
that  word  is  confusing,  since  its  first  significance 
is  to  describe  the  love  of  the  child  for  its  parent, 
of  the  Christian  for  God,  and  other  similar  cases 
in  which  the  great  value  of  the  actions  to  which 
it  leads  are  to  the  one  who  loves.  This  other 
feeling  which  has  for  its  purpose  the  welfare  of 
the  one  who  is  loved  is  sometimes  called  "sym- 
pathy," though  strictly  that  term  applies  to  only 
one  phase  of  it,  the  affection  for  another  which 

[67] 


CHILD  NATURE  AND  CHILD  NURTURE 

leads  one  to  suffer  with  him  in  sorrow  and  to 
rejoice  in  his  joys.  The  importance  of  clearly 
distinguishing  these  two  kinds  of  "love"  will 
appear  in  connection  with  the  plans  for  its  train- 
ing. 

This  feeling  manifests  itself  in  a  great  variety 
of  ways.  —  The  love  of  a  mother  for  her  helpless 
child  who  demands  so  much  of  purely  unselfish 
service  is  a  typical  form.  Generosity  is  this 
feeling  manifested  in  relation  to  property. 
Humane  feeling  is  its  manifestation  toward  the 
lower  animals.  Mercy  or  forgiveness  is  altruistic 
feeling  triumphing  over  anger.  Its  manifesta- 
tions in  the  ordinary  relations  of  life  we  call 
unselfishness.  The  missionary  spirit  is  its  mani- 
festation in  relation  to  religion.  We  may  plan 
to  develop  each  one  of  these  separately,  but  it 
is  possible  so  to  train  the  root  impulse  of  all  that 
the  development  of  each  of  these  phases  will  be 
greatly  aided. 

This  spirit  of  unselfishness  and  active  kindness 
is  stirred  by  the  realization  of  another's  need.  — 
It  cannot  be  awakened  by  an  argument.  To 
declare  that  unselfishness  is  a  duty  does  not  bring 
the  feeling  into  being.  But  the  simple,  vivid 
story  of  great  need  which  a  child  can  supply 
does  awaken  the  impulse  to  help.  The  sight  of 
the  actual  situation  and  the  intimate  knowledge 
that  comes  from  personal  association  is  many  times 
more  effective.  The  average  person  will  give 
ten  times  as  much  to  relieve  the  wants  of  one 
poor  child  whom  he  has  seen  crying  from  hunger 
as  he  will  to  relieve  thousands  whom  he  knows 
to  be  in  actual  danger  of  starvation  in  Russia  or 
India.     This  fact,  that  it  is  the  natural  response 

[68  1 


TRAINING  THE   CHILD 

to  certain  conditions  about  the  child,  makes  it 
measurably  possible  to  stimulate  it  at  will.  Just 
as  the  realization  of  danger  stirs  fear  in  the  child, 
just  as  the  realization  that  he  is  being  wronged 
stirs  anger,  so  the  vivid  realization  of  the  need 
and  opportunity  for  service  which  he  can  render 
stirs  in  his  heart  the  impulse  of  love  for  those  who 
cannot  serve  him,  but  whose  need  of  service  is 
apparent. 

QUESTIONS  FOR  DISCUSSION 

1.  Is  the  distinction  between  love  and  altruistic  feeling  clear? 

2.  What  are  the  circumstances  that  stimulate  love  of  the  kind 
studied  in  Lessons  XIII  and  XIV? 

3.  Mention  illustrations  of  love  that  you  have  observed  in  chil- 
dren. 

4.  Mention  cases  of  altruistic  feeling  manifested  by  children. 

5.  Why  is  it  important  that  the  parent  or  teacher  should  dis- 
tinguish between  the  two  kinds  of  love? 


[69 


CHILD  NATURE  AND  CHILD  NURTURE 


Lesson  XVI.    The  Natural  Development  of 
Unselfishness 

The  most  distant  acquaintance  with  the  first  years 
of  human  Hfe  tells  us  that  young  children  have  much 
in  common  with  the  lower  animals.  Their  character- 
istic passions  and  impulses  are  centered  in  self  and  the 
satisfaction  of  its  wants.  .  .  .  But  if  a  child  has  his 
outbursts  of  temper  he  has  also  his  fits  of  tenderness. 

—  James  Sully. 

One  of  the  greatest  pleasures  which  is  offered  is 
that  of  being  allowed  to  "help"  somebody.  .  .  .  He 
knows  the  joy  of  ministering  to  others. 

—  Kate  Douglas  Wiggin. 


Unselfishness  is  rare  among  the  lower  animals. 

—  Fear  and  anger  are  as  apparent  among  them  as 
in  man,  but  sacrifice  of  self  for  the  welfare  of 
others  has  little  place.  Almost  the  sole  manifes- 
tation of  this  feeling  which  appears  is  in  the  rela- 
tions of  parents  with  the  young,  and  in  case  of  the 
father  it  is  not  nearly  as  strong  as  in  the  mother. 
The  one  other  case  in  which  it  often  appears 
among  the  lower  animals  is  the  case  of  those  that 
go  in  flocks  or  herds.  Among  these  the  leader 
of  the  flock,  usually  the  oldest  male,  does  defend 
the  weaker  members.  Except  in  these  relations, 
selfishness  is  practically  universal  among  ani- 
mals. Even  where  mother  love  Is  most  marked 
It  lasts  only  during  the  infancy  of  the  young. 
The  hen  or  the  mother  cat  will  share  Its  food  with 
its  young  at  first,  but  before  they  are  fully  grown 
they  are  ruthlessly  driven  away  until  the  parent's 
appetite  is  satisfied.     Adults  fight  with  each  other 

[70] 


TRAINING  THE   CHILD 

for  food  and  for  every  other  pleasure  which  they 
know. 

Men  of  the  lower  races  show  little  of  unselfish 
love  for  others.  —  Infanticide  is  common  among 
savages.  The  killing  of  parents  when  they  become 
old  and  feeble  is  not  unknown  as  a  regular  prac- 
tise. There  is  little  or  no  sympathy  for  the 
sick,  and  where  individual  property  rights  are 
recognized  there  is  little  disposition  to  share  with 
the  poor.  Their  enemies  are  killed  without  hesi- 
tation, but  often  after  prolonged  and  excruciat- 
ing torture.  As  we  study  men  who  are  higher 
in  the  scale  of  development  we  find  a  gradual 
softening  of  their  natures,  and  an  increase  in 
the  readiness  to  practise  self-denial  for  the 
sake  of  others.  Yet,  in  the  days  of  Christ  the 
sight  of  men  and  women  torn  to  pieces  by  wild 
beasts  was  a  popular  recreation. 

Our  Christian  ancestors  showed  much  less  of 
altruistic  feeling  than  the  men  of  today  who  are 
outside  of  the  Church.  —  During  the  middle  ages 
men  and  women  were  condemned  to  the  most 
terrible  tortures  because  of  heresies  that  today 
would  not  shut  them  out  of  our  churches.  People 
gathered  in  crowds  to  witness  their  sufferings, 
and  shouted  with  laughter  at  their  contortions. 
In  the  days  of  Queen  Elizabeth,  some  four  hun- 
dred years  ago,  five  persons  out  of  every  thousand 
were  executed  as  criminals,  and  the  stealing  of 
a  sheep  was  far  from  the  least  of  the  crimes  for 
which  death  was  the  penalty.  In  New  England 
aged  men  and  women  were  pressed  to  death  as 
witches.  Bear-baiting,  cock-fighting,  dog-fight- 
ing, and  pigeon-shooting  were  the  recreations  of 
our  fathers.     War  was  far  more  cruel  fifty  years 

[71] 


CHILD  NATURE  AND  CHILD  NURTURE 

ago,  and  today  arbitration  is  averting  it  in  many 
cases.  It  is  plain  that  our  present  standards 
of  kindness  and  unselfishness  have  been  very 
recently  attained  by  the  race. 

The  child  is  much  less  sympathetic  and  unself- 
ish than  the  youth  or  the  adult.  —  At  first  thought 
many  parents  will  question  this  statement,  but 
a  very  little  observation  will  confirm  it.  That 
children  are  easily  influenced  by  adults  to  seem- 
ing unselfishness  at  times  is  quite  apparent,  but 
when  there  is  a  real  case  of  self-denial  the  inner 
impulses  appear.  The  young  child  demands 
what  he  wants  without  regard  to  the  effect  of 
his  demand  upon  the  happiness  of  others.  Quar- 
reling is  common  among  children  for  the  same 
reason.  They  are  often  exceedingly  selfish  in 
their  attitude  toward  their  parents  when  they 
are  asked  to  assist  in  home  duties.  Frequently 
children  are  very  cruel  to  the  lower  animals,  and 
often  to  their  playmates  as  well.  These  and  many 
other  facts  indicate  that  unselfishness  and  kind- 
ness are  not  as  natural  to  the  child  as  are  the 
directly  self-preservative  feelings,  such  as  fear, 
anger,  and  love.  In  youth,  however,  there  is  a 
very  marked  development  of  unselfishness,  and  at 
sixteen  or  seventeen  years  of  age  it  often  becomes 
so  strong  a  motive  as  to  determine  the  choice  of 
a  life-work,  as  in  the  case  of  the  missionary,  the 
minister,  and  sometimes  the  physician  and  nurse. 

These  facts  are  in  harmony  with  a  well  estab- 
lished law  of  the  development  of  human  nature. 
Those  traits  that  are  late  attainments  of  the 
race  appear  later  in  the  life  of  the  child,  and  are 
not  nearly  so  certain  to  appear  at  all.  They  need 
culture  by  the  parent  and  teacher  if  the  child  is 

[72] 


TRAINING  THE   CHILD 

to  reach  the  highest  standard.  No  normal  child 
needs  to  be  taught  to  get  angry  when  he  is 
wronged.  Nor  does  he  need  to  be  taught  to  desire 
property.  But  it  is  necessary  to  teach  him  to 
control  anger  and  the  desire  for  gain  by  altru- 
istic feeling,  because  this  feeling  is  so  weak  as 
yet  that  it  does  not  instinctively  do  so.  One 
important  lesson  of  this  study  of  the  develop- 
ment of  unselfishness  is  the  emphasis  upon  the 
fact  that  it  is  a  virtue  that  must  be  taught.  The 
selfish  impulses  are  instinctive;  this  is  only  partly 
so. 

QUESTIONS  FOR  DISCUSSION 

1.  In  the  lesson  it  is  intimated  that  the  apparent  unselfishness 
of  some  little  children  is  really  manifested  when  there  is  no  very- 
great  demand  for  actual  self-denial.  Do  you  accept  this  as  fact? 
Bring  cases  that  you  have  observed  which  substantiate  your  posi- 
tion. 

2.  Does  the  lesson  imply  that  there  is  no  unselfishness  in  young 
children?  If  there  were  none,  would  any  efforts  for  training  them 
in  unselfishness  be  of  avail? 

3.  What  changes  in  the  line  of  added  unselfishness  and  tender- 
ness toward  the  unfortunate  have  appeared  in  the  common  standards 
of  the  people  generally  during  your  memory? 

4.  Give  from  your  own  observation  illustrations  of  the  growing 
unselfishness  of  young  people  as  they  enter  adolescence. 

5.  Do  you  see  any  good  reason  why  young  children  should  be 
more  selfish  than  adults?  Is  it  to  be  expected  that  children  will 
ever  be  as  ready  to  sacrifice  themselves  and  their  vital  interests  as 
adults  are? 

6.  While  unselfishness  directly  seeks  the  welfare  of  others,  does  it 
indirectly  benefit  the  individual?  Is  it  true  that  it  does  (or  that  it 
does  not)  in  every  case? 


73  I 


CHILD  NATURE  AND  CHILD  NURTURE 


Lesson   XVIL     The   Culture   of 
Unselfishness 

Seek  to  give  outward  form  to  the  feelings  that  stir 
the  child's  heart.  —  Friedrich  Froebel. 

Any  working  of  the  feelings  without  opportunity 
to  act  is  likely  to  result  in  impairment.  It  produces  a 
soft  sentimentality.  —  Patterson  Du  Bois. 

The  first  step  is  to  reveal  to  a  child  another's 
need  and  his  own  opportunity  to  Tielp.  —  As  has 

already  been  indicated,  the  more  that  this  can  be 
done  through  personal  observation  and  direct  con- 
tact with  the  actual  conditions,  the  more  effect- 
ive will  it  be.  Giving  playthings  to  be  sent  to 
city  slums  or  Western  frontier  has  exceedingly 
little  value  in  the  education  of  the  child  if  he 
simply  sees  them  put  into  a  barrel  "  to  be  sent 
to  the  missionary."  If  the  children  to  whom 
they  will  go,  and  their  lack  of  the  ordinary 
pleasures  of  the  children  who  give,  are  vividly 
described,  it  will  have  much  greater  value.  If 
the  child  can  be  enabled  actually  to  see  such 
conditions  near  his  own  home,  and  so  more  fully 
realize  the  need,  the  experience  will  be  far  more 
helpful.  Without  the  appreciation  of  real  need, 
the  feeling  cannot  arise.  It  is  said  that  a  queen 
of  France,  when  told  that  the  people  were  dying 
for  lack  of  bread,  said,  "Why  do  they  not  eat 
cake.'"'  Mythical  as  It  probably  is,  the  story 
illustrates  the  principle. 

This  feeling,  like  every  other,  grows  through 
exercise.  —  To  lead  it  to  frequent  expression  Is 

[74] 


TRAINING  THE   CHILD 

to  provide  that  it  shall  have  a  larger  and  more 
permanent  place  in  the  nature  of  the  individual 
who  has  this  experience.  The  one  who  practises 
self-denial  grows  more  ready  to  do  so.  To  do 
kind  deeds  is  to  make  it  more  easy  to  do  them. 
This  is  as  true  of  the  child  as  of  the  adult,  provided 
the  act  is  really  prompted  by  the  unselfish  impulse. 
Hence  it  is  possible  for  the  parent  very  largely 
to  control  the  development  of  this  side  of  the 
child's  character.  By  planning  that  he  shall 
become  conscious  of  the  need  of  others,  and  of 
his  ability  to  aid  them  in  some  way,  it  is  pos- 
sible to  secure  the  stirring  of  the  feeling;  by 
wisely  directing  the  manifestation  of  the  feel- 
ing it  is  given  a  certain  education.  For  the 
child's  own  sake  the  parent  should  often  ask 
some  service  of  him.  For  the  eiTect  upon  his 
character  the  parent  should  search  out  oppor- 
tunities to  bring  him  in  touch  with  real  want  or 
suffering  of  such  a  kind  as  the  child  himself  can 
aid  in  relieving. 

The  stirring  of  altruistic  feeling  has  little  or 
no  value  unless  it  results  in  the  real  effort  to  cor- 
rect the  conditions  that  occasioned  it.  —  Tears 
and  words  of  commiseration  have  a  place  if  there 
is  no  means  of  rendering  aid,  but  they  are  not 
the  normal  expression  of  these  feelings.  They 
are  nature's  means  of  relieving  the  strain  when 
no  active  response  is  possible.  But  if  the  feelings 
are  frequently  stirred  when  the  action  is  not  pos- 
sible, there  is  a  tendency  to  form  the  habit  of 
expressing  sympathy  only  in  this  way.  So  it  is 
safe  to  say  that  it  is  not  wise  for  the  child  to  have 
frequent  knowledge  of  suffering  that  he  cannot 
relieve    to    some    extent.     When    the    child    docs 

[75] 


CHILD  NATURE  AND  CHILD  NURTURE 

manifest  the  feeling  it  should   always  be  led  to 
some  practical  outcome. 


QUESTIONS  FOR  DISCUSSION 

1.  What  are  some  of  the  practicable  ways  of  making  the  needs 
of  others  outside  the  home  known  to  the  child? 

2.  Mention  additional  ways  in  which  a  child  can  really  lessen 
the  suffering  or  add  to  the  welfare  of  others. 

3.  What  are  the  best  opportunities  for  the  training  of  altruistic 
feeling  in  the  home? 

4.  What  are  some  of  the  best  ways  of  giving  this  training  to  ten- 
year-old  boys?     To  girls  of  the  same  age? 

5.  Have  you  used  the  methods  that  the  lesson  advocates?     If 
so,  with  what  success? 


[76 


TRAINING  THE   CHILD 


Lesson    XVIII.     Some  Things  to  Avoid 

Giving  to  those  they  love  is  a  pleasure  to  children 
as  well  as  to  "grown-up"  people  and  sometimes  we 
don't  let  them  have  enough  of  this  pleasure,  but  stunt 
the  generous  impulses  by  .  .  .  failing  to  encourage 
effort  and  self-denial  on  their  part. 

—  Mary  G.  Trask. 

There  is  such  a  thing  as  puttipg  too  much  pressure 
on  children  to  be  self-sacrificing.  ...  In  the  effort 
to  excite  right  feelings  in  their  children,  fathers  pro- 
voke them  to  wrath.  —  Patterson  Du  Bois. 

Never  refuse  the  proffered  service  of  a  child 
that  is  prompted  by  the  impulse  to  help  another. 

—  Sometimes  the  particular  act  that  the  child 
proposes  may  not  be  really  helpful,  or  it  may 
require  more  than  the  child  can  give  in  justice 
to  himself,  but  always  the  helpful  or  sympathetic 
spirit  should  be  led  to  some  act  that  means  real 
aid  for  the  one  vi^ho  is  helped  and  some  measure 
of  self-denial  for  the  helper.  If  the  child's  own 
plan  can  be  carried  out,  so  much  the  better. 
If  It  cannot,  some  wiser  one  In  which  he  can 
have  a  vital  part  should  be  substituted  for  it, 
and  to  this  new  plan  the  child's  hearty  assent 
should  be  won. 

To  command  an  unselfish  act  against  the  child's 
will  must  have  an  unfortunate  effect  upon  charac- 
ter.—  The  feeling  that  Is  stirred  at  the  time  the 
act  is  performed  is  one  of  resentment,  and  the 
feeling  that  one's  rights  are  Interfered  with. 
The  actual  result  of  such  training  Is  usually  to 
cause  a  reaction  against  such  unselfish  impulses 

[77] 


CHILD  NATURE  AND  CHILD  NURTURE 

as  already  exist.  There  is,  of  course,  no  real 
unselfishness  in  the  act,  and  it  is  the  other  feel- 
ings that  are  stirred  that  are  being  strengthened 
through  exercise.  There  are  times  when  the 
parent  must  interfere  in  the  interests  of  justice, 
but  if  compulsion  is  used  it  should  be  on  the 
score  of  justice,  and  not  in  the  guise  of  an  incen- 
tive to  unselfishness. 

To  reward  an  unselfish  act  can  hardly  fail  to 
stir  a  selfish  motive  to  take  the  place  of  a  gener- 
ous one.  —  We  must  remember  that  unselfish- 
ness is  its  own  reward.  And  it  is  a  sufficient  one. 
The  most  that  the  parent  should  do  is  to  call  the 
child's  attention  to  the  pleasure  that  has  come 
to  the  one  who  is  helped.  Even  carefully  guarded 
praise  of  unselfishness  almost  always  serves  to 
substitute  a  new  impulse  for  the  generous  one 
that  had  been  aroused.  Miss  Harrison  tells  of 
two  children  who,  while  they  were  left  alone  by 
their  parents,  lay  down  to  sleep,  the  older  one 
giving  all  of  the  one  covering  to  the  younger 
because  she  complained  of  being  cold.  Upon 
the  return  of  the  parents  the  unselfish  child 
was  rewarded  with  candy.  When  they  were  next 
left  alone  she  bent  all  her  energies  to  getting  her 
little  sister  to  go  to  bed  and  use  all  the  coverings 
—  in  order  that  she  might  receive  more  candy! 
So  was  a  really  unselfish  impulse  perverted  by  a 
thoughtless  parent. 

Any  expression  of  altruistic  feeling  that  is  sug- 
gested by  the  parent  should  be  suited  to  the 
development  of  the  child's  sympathies.  —  The 
young  child's  heart  goes  out  to  those  who  are 
near  to  his  own  life,  and  only  to  such.  He  can 
feel   deeply  for   children   more   readily  than   for 

[78] 


TRAINING  THE   CHILD 

adults;  his  heart  goes  out  more  easily  to  those 
who  have  the  same  interests  as  himself  than  to 
those  whose  lives  are  very  different;  he  responds 
to  suffering  such  as  he  can  appreciate  through 
his  own  experiences  rather  than  to  that  which 
is  much  greater,  but  which  he  has  never  known. 
It  is  in  the  home  and  school  and  the  immediate 
neighborhood  that  the  most  valuable  oppor- 
tunities for  his  training  are  found.  It  is  a  false 
pseudo-sympathy  that  is  stirred  when  one  tries 
to  lead  him  far  outside  this  small  but  constantly 
widening  circle.  The  best  way  to  secure  the 
broader  sympathy  is  to  make  the  most  of  the 
really  spontaneous  narrower  one  in  these  early 
years. 

QUESTIONS  FOR  DISCUSSION 

1.  A  mother  who  was  beginning  such  training  of  her  little  daughter 
as  has  been  advocated  told  her  of  children  who  had  no  playthings, 
and  asked  what  should  be  done  about  it.  The  child  said,  "I  will 
give  them  my  best  doll."  The  mother  said:  "Oh,  no!  You  must  not 
do  that,  for  you  will  want  it  to  play  with  yourself.  You  may  give 
them  the  old  one  that  you  had  last  year."  What  would  be  the  effect 
of  such  training  upon  the  development  of  unselfishness  in  the  child? 
Should  the  child  be  encouraged  to  do  as  she  proposed.'' 

2.  Suppose  in  such  a  case  you  feared  that  the  child  would  repent 
of  her  generosity  and  wish  the  doll  back,  thus  defeating  the  end  of 
the  training,  how  would  you  deal  with  the  case.' 

3.  A  little  girl  had  given  up  a  pleasure  that  it  might  be  enjoyed 
by  a  poor  child  of  her  acquaintance.  An  older  friend  of  the  family 
said,  "I  am  sure  that  you  were  very  generous  to  do  that."  The 
mother  hastily  interposed,  "I  am  sure  that  it  made  Annie  very  happy, 
and  that  makes  my  little  daughter  happy,  too,  does  it  not.''"  What 
feeling  would  each  remark  tend  to  awaken  in  the  child's  heart.'' 

4.  Is  giving  to  foreign  missions  the  best  training  in  altruism  for 
a  girl  of  five  years?     Why? 


79 


CHILD  NATURE  AND   CHILD  NURTURE 


Lesson  XIX.     The  Moral  Value  of  Playing 
WITH  Dolls 

Altruistic  feeling  had  its  origin  in  motherhood, 
and  it  has  reached  no  greater  heights  of  self- 
denial  and  service  than  in  that  same  relationship. 
In  playing  with  her  doll  the  child  is  in  thought 
and  feeling  making  that  experience  her  own. 
At  a  very  formative  period  of  her  life  it  gives  her 
much  the  same  training  that  the  race  has  received 
through  the  actual  experience.  The  following 
references  will  be  helpful  to  the  parent  who  wishes 
to  make  the  most  of  the  opportunities  thus 
afforded:  Studies  of  Childhood,  by  James  Sully, 
pp.  42-51  and  492-493;  Childhood,  by  Mrs.  The- 
odore W.  Birney,  pp.  90-98;  Children's  Rights, 
by  Kate  Douglas  Wiggin,  pp.  49-67;  Studies  in 
Imagination,  by  Lillian  H.  Chalmers,  Pedagog- 
ical Seminary,  Vol.  VII,  pp.  111-123;  A  Study  of 
Dolls,  by  Ellis  and  Hall,  Pedagogical  Seminary, 
Vol.  IV,  pp.  129-175;  Play  Interests  of  Children, 
by  Mrs.  Frederick  Burke,  Northwestern  Monthly, 
Vol.  IX,  pp.  349-355- 

"Take  away  the  doll,  you  erase  from  the  heart 
and  head  feelings,  images,  poetry,  aspiration,  experi- 
ence, ready  for  application  to  real  life." 

That  boys  are  naturally  fond  of  and  should  play 
with     dolls     there    is     abundant     indication. 

—  Ellis  and  Hall. 

Every  mother  knows  the  development  of  tender- 
ness and  motherliness  that  goes  on  in  her  little  girl 
through  the  nursing  and  petting  and  teaching  and 
caring  for  her  doll.  —  Kate  Douglas  Wiggin. 

[80I 


TRAINING  THE   CHILD 

The  educational  value  of  dolls  is  enormous.  .  .  . 
It  educates  the  heart  and  will  more  than  the  intellect, 
and  to  learn  how  to  control  and  apply  it  will  be  to  dis- 
cover a  new  instrument  in  education  of  the  very  high- 
est potency.  —  G.  Stanley  Hall. 

Every  impulse  toward  loving  care  of  the  doll 
should  be  encouraged. — To  the  child  in  her 
play  it  is  a  living  child,  and  hence  the  experience 
provides  the  same  kind  of  emotional  training  that 
would  come  from  the  care  of  a  baby,  without 
the  obvious  disadvantages  to  the  Infant.  When 
the  child  declares  that  her  doll  will  be  lonely  or 
cold  at  night,  the  wise  step,  from  the  point  of 
view  of  moral  education.  Is  to  meet  her  half-way 
and  say,  "Very  well  you  may  put  her  bed  close 
beside  yours,"  or,  "You  may  cover  her  with  the 
warm  blanket."  In  time  she  will  discover  the 
facts  and  they  will  come  to  her  without  a  shock. 
But  if  the  mother  says,  "She  Is  only  a  doll;  she 
cannot  feel,"  not  only  does  the  loving  Impulse 
fall  of  expression,  but  the  child  only  half  believes 
what  Is  said;  and  If  she  acts  upon  the  suggestion 
it  really  means  unklndness  upon  her  part,  and 
that  feeling  Is  the  one  that  Is  strengthened. 

The  extent  to  which  a  doll  can  be  cared  for 
as  if  it  were  a  child  is  the  measure  of  its  educa- 
tional value.  —  The  one  that  can  be  dressed  and 
undressed,  bathed,  fed,  and  freely  cared  for  at 
any  time  Is  far  better  than  the  expensive  one  that 
is  easily  Injured  and  whose  finery  must  not  be 
soiled.  The  fact  that  the  rag  doll  or  the  rubber 
doll  Is  often  the  one  most  dearly  loved  by  the 
child  Is  evidence  that  this  statement  Is  war- 
ranted, and  that  to  act  upon  the  suggestion  is 
not  to  lessen  the  pleasure  of  the  child. 

[8i] 


CHILD  NATURE  AND  CHILD  NURTURE 

Doll-play  in  boys  should  be  encouraged,  but 
as  they  grow  older  not  to  the  discouragement  of 
more  virile  amusements.  —  The  tender  side  of 
fatherhood  has  hardly  reached  the  development 
that  it  deserves  in  the  average  man,  and  further 
progress  in  that  line  need  not  involve  sacrifice 
of  any  other  qualities  that  are  desirable.  Tender- 
ness toward  children  need  not  disqualify  a  man 
for  success  in  business,  nor  even  as  a  soldier. 
It  is  to  be  expected  that  the  boy  will  earlier  lose 
his  interest  in  such  play,  but  while  it  lasts  it 
is  one  of  the  important  opportunities  of  moral 
education. 

In  time  doll-play  naturally  gives  place  to  the 
care  of  pets  or  of  young  children,  and  such  a 
tendency  should  be  encouraged,  —  As  the  child 
grows  older  she  gradually  comes  to  realize  that 
the  plaything  does  not  in  any  way  respond  to 
her  loving  care.  Then  comes  a  tendency,  often 
intermittent  at  first,  to  turn  from  the  doll  to 
these  living  creatures  as  objects  of  her  tender 
feelings.  It  is  the  next  step  in  nature's  curricu- 
lum of  moral  education,  and  sympathetic  feelings 
receive  larger  development  in  this  way. 

QUESTIONS   FOR  DISCUSSION 

1.  Can  you  suggest  any  substitutes  for  doll-play  that  have  the 
same  educational  value? 

2.  How  would  you  deal  with  the  child  who  treats  her  doll  un- 
kindly? 

3.  When  a  child  cries  at  bedtime  because  her  doll  has  been  left 
out  of  doors  what  would  you  do  about  it? 

4.  Did  the  "teddy-bear"  craze  interfere  with  the  training  that 
has  been  suggested  above?  Study  the  way  that  the  children  played 
with  the  bears  as  a  guide  to  the  answer. 

5.  From  the  point  of  view  of  the  child's  welfare  and  pleasure, 
what  added  value,  if  any,  have  very  large  and  expensive  dolls? 

f82l 


L 


1ST  EN  I NG  to  the  Birds 


TRAINING  THE   CHILD 

Lesson  XX.     Training    in    Kindness   to   the 
Lower  Animals 

Kindness  to  animals  is  one  of  the  expressions 
of  altruistic  feeling,  and  hence  is  a  means  of  its 
education.  Animals  have  some  rights  that  should 
be  regarded,  but  kindness  toward  them  is  even 
more  important  on  account  of  its  effect  upon 
character.  In  addition  to  the  readings  suggested 
at  the  opening  of  Topic  VI,  which  deal  with  the 
general  development  of  the  feeling,  helpful  sug- 
gestions will  be  found  in  the  following  references: 
Our  Children,  by  Paul  Carus,  pp.  46-49;  the  pub- 
lications of  The  American  Humane  Education 
Society,  Boston,  Mass.;  those  of  local  Humane 
Societies,  of  the  Audubon  Societies,  etc.  Many 
recent  books  on  nature  study  will  be  helpful, 
especially  Nature  Study  and  Life,  by  C.  F.  Hodge, 
and  How  to  Attract  the  Birds,  by  Gilbert  Traf- 
ton;  Black  Beauty,  by  Anna  Sewell,  and  many  sto- 
ries by  Ernest  Thompson  Seton  will  be  useful  to 
put  in  the  hands  of  children. 

A  righteous  man  regardeth  the  life  of  his  beast. 

—  Proverbs  12:10. 

Nothing  softens  the  heart  more  than  tenderness  and 
protection  extended  to  the  lower  creation. 

—  Marshall  Saunders. 

We  are  all  in  the  same  boat,  both  animals  and  men. 
You  cannot  promote  kindness  to  one  without  bene- 
fiting the  other.  —  Edward  Everett  Hale. 

Hunting  and  fishing  are  good  outdoor  exercises, 
but  they  can  be  tolerated  only  on  the  condition  that 

[83] 


CHILD  NATURE  AND  CHILD  NURTURE 

the  mind  does  not  dwell  upon  the  havoc  that  is  caused 
in  animal  life. 

—  Paul  Carus. 


Certain  impulses  in  the  child  tend  toward 
cruelty.  —  First  of  all,  the  child  commonly  does 
not  realize  the  suffering  that  he  often  causes  the 
little  creatures  that  are  within  his  power.  The 
contortions  of  a  tortured  animal  give  him  delight 
because  he  is  entirely  ignorant  of  its  pain.  Curi- 
osity and  delight  in  unusual  activities  often  prompt 
the  child  to  unconscious  cruelty.  The  desire  to 
make  collections  often  leads  to  the  taking  of 
birds'  eggs,  the  collecting  of  Insects,  and  the 
mounting  of  the  skins  of  birds  and  animals. 
The  hunting  Impulse,  which  was  the  means  of 
protection  and  subsistence  of  many  generations 
of  our  ancestors  is  to  a  certain  extent  instinc- 
tive in  the  child.  It  finds  manifestation  In  the 
tendency  to  kill  small  animals,  in  the  use  of  the 
air-gun  to  shoot  birds,  and  later  in  the  pursuit 
of  game  with  more  formidable  weapons.  Some  of 
these  recreations  have  legitimate  place  within  cer- 
tain limits  but  they  need  wise  guidance  and  careful 
oversight.  In  case  of  the  younger  children  and 
youth.  If  they  are  not  to  work  injury  to  character. 

In  positive  training,  one  of  the  first  points  to 
be  guarded  is  that  of  example.  —  As  far  as  Is 
possible  young  children  should  be  shielded  from 
the  sight  of  the  taking  of  life  either  In  the  case 
of  pests  or  of  animals  used  for  food.  In  the  city 
home  this  Is  not  difficult,  but  on  the  farm  It  will 
require  thoughtful  planning.  When  the  child 
Is  old  enough  to  realize  the  necessity  of  such 
taking  of   life,  and   when   It   Is   effected  without 

[84] 


TRAINING  THE   CHILD 

suffering  to  the  creature,  such  a  policy  of  con- 
cealment is  hardly  wise.  Especial  care  should  be 
observed  that  life  is  never  wantonly  taken  or 
suffering  needlessly  inflicted  by  those  with  whom 
the  child  is  associated.  A  child  may  easily  be 
hardened  by  what  he  observes  in  the  conduct 
of  servants  or  playmates. 

Another  step  toward  the  correction  of  the 
unfortunate  tendencies  of  child  nature  that  are 
mentioned  above  is  to  inform  the  child  as  to  the 
sufferings  that  his  thoughtless  conduct  may 
cause.  —  Some  parents  have  caused  a  child  who 
neglected  to  feed  his  pets  to  go  without  a  meal, 
not  so  much  as  a  retribution  as  that  he  might 
learn  to  sympathize  with  them.  One  way  of 
giving  positive  training  is  by  reading  or  provid- 
ing for  the  child  such  stories  as  are  mentioned 
above.  Most  of  these  stories  are  overdrawn  in 
that  they  represent  the  mental  life  of  the  lower 
animals  as  too  much  like  our  own,  but  it  can 
hardly  be  doubted  that  their  influence  is  good  on 
the  whole. 

The  best  of  all  training  is  of  the  direct  and 
positive  kind. — This  is  that  by  which  the  child 
is  led  to  the  active  expression  of  kindness  to  the 
creatures.  The  care  of  pets  has  great  value  here. 
The  child  who  is  trained  to  really  kind  and 
thoughtful  provision  for  their  welfare  is  learning 
lessons  of  tenderness  that  will  appear  in  many 
other  relations.  Besides  this,  very  much  can  be 
accomplished  by  leading  the  child  to  provide 
food,  shelter,  and  protection  for  wild  animals  and 
birds.  Though  it  is  not  commonly  realized  it 
is  true  that  children  can  easily  tame  wild  squir- 
rels and  birds  to  such  an  extent  that    they    will 

[85] 


CHILD  NATURE  AND  CHILD  NURTURE 

feed  from  their  hands.  It  is  particularly  easy 
to  attract  birds  about  the  house  by  providing 
nesting  places  and  food.  In  country  and  village 
this  can  always  be  done,  and  usually  in  the  city, 
if  there  is  a  tree  on  the  lawn,  by  methods  described 
in  the  books  mentioned  above.  The  moral 
value  of  such  relationships  with  living  creatures 
is  very  great,  and  they  afford  the  greatest  pleas- 
ure to  children.  Hunting  with  the  camera  is 
even  more  attractive  to  the  youth  than  hunting 
with  the  gun. 

QUESTIONS   FOR  DISCUSSION 

1.  What  is  the  real  value  of  games  such  as  are  used  in  the  kin- 
dergarten, in  which  the  children  represent  caterpillars,  butterflies, 
birds,  etc.? 

2.  A  little  child  found  a  sick  mouse  and  asked  permission  to  care 
for  it.  The  mother's  first  thought  can  be  easily  imagined.  Think- 
ing that  there  was  an  opportunity  for  the  culture  of  the  child's  feel- 
ings of  sympathy,  she  gave  him  a  box  of  cotton  to  equip  the  hospital. 
What  do  you  think  of  this.? 

3.  Before  night  the  mouse  died,  there  was  a  funeral  in  the  back 
yard,  and  the  mother  forgot  the  incident.  Several  days  later  she 
asked  the  child  to  play  out  of  doors  because  her  head  ached.  He 
said,  "Oh,  mamma,  you  go  to  bed  and  I  will  take  care  of  you." 
"You  can't  do  it,  you  don't,  know  how,"  said  the  mother.  "Oh, 
yes,  I  do,"  said  he;  "I  learned  how  taking  care  of  that  little  mouse." 
Had  the  boy  really  learned  anything  that  was  worth  while .'' 

4.  There  are  often  inconveniences  attached  to  the  keeping  of 
pets;  are  there  any  real  dangers  of  disadvantage  to  the  child.'' 

5.  What  pets  are  most  desirable?     Why? 


86 


TRAINING  THE   CHILD 


Lesson  XXL     Training  the  Child  in 
Courtesy 

Courtesy  Is  the  formal  manifestation  of  kind- 
ness. Though  it  may  begin  only  as  a  form  it 
may  react  upon  character.  It  is  as  closely 
related  to  morality  as  to  convention.  References 
to  literature  dealing  with  this  phase  of  the  child's 
training  will  be  found  as  indicated  in  the  follow- 
ing list  of  books:  Childhood,  by  Mrs.  Theodore 
Birney,  pp.  118-126;  Hints  on  Child  Training, 
by  H.  Clay  Trumbull,  pp.  165-174;  Child  Cul- 
ture in  the  Home,  by  Martha  B.  Mosher,  pp. 
164-181;  Household  Education,  by  Harriet  Marti- 
neau,  pp.  295-360;  Making  the  Best  of  Our  Chil- 
dren, by  Mary  Wood-Allen,  pp.  11 3-1 28  and 
193-200;  The  Mother's  Book,  by  Lydia  Maria 
Childs,  pp.  109-120  (old-fashioned  forms,  but 
wise  suggestions  for  training);  Hints  on  Early 
Education,  published  by  Funk  &  Wagnalls,  pp. 
y^-jy;  Concerning  Children,  by  Charlotte  Per- 
kins Gilman,  pp.  169-199;  Bits  of  Home  Talk,  by 
Helen  Hunt  Jackson,  pp.  28-38,  65-70. 

Be  tenderly  affectioned  one  to  another;  in  honor 
preferring  one  another.  —  Rom.  12  :  10. 

Do  nothing  through  faction  or  through  vainglory, 
but  in  lowliness  of  mind  each  counting  other  better 
than  himself;  not  looking  each  of  you  to  his  own  things, 
but  each  of  you  also  to  the  things  of  others. 

—  Phil.  2  :  3,  4. 

Good  breeding  Is  made  up  of  a  multitude  of  petty 
sacrifices. 

—  Anon. 

[87] 


CHILD  NATURE  AND  CHILD  NURTURE 

The  first  requisite  of  good  manners  is  self-forget- 
fulness.  —  Mrs.  Theodore  W.  Birney. 

Courtesy  is  the  external  manifestation  of  a  right 
spirit  toward  others.  —  H.  Clay  Trumbull. 

No  child  can  become  truly  courteous  unless  he  is 
so  in  the  every-day  life  of  his  home. 

—  Martha  B.  Mosher. 

With  all  our  care,  however,  we  are  not  to  expect 
that  the  manners  of  children  will  be  superior  to  those 
of  the  persons  with  whom   they  habitually  associate. 
—  Hints  on  Early  Education. 

"Hold  your  tongue!"  says  the  mother.  "Hold 
yours!"  answers  the  child  and  is  promptly  whipped 
for  impertinence.  "I'll  teach  you  to  answer  me  like 
that!"  says  angry  mamma.     And  she  does. 

Charlotte  Perkins  Gilman. 


Politeness  is  the  formal  expression  of  sympa- 
thetic and  kindly  feeling  toward  others.  —  No 
mere  forms  are  essential  to  true  courtesy.  A 
gentleman  will  reveal  his  spirit  however  ignorant 
of  social  conventions  he  may  be.  The  most 
essential  step  in  the  formation  of  the  child's  man- 
ners, then,  is  such  training  in  unselfishness  and 
thoughtfulness  for  others  as  has  been  suggested 
in  preceding  lessons.  But  certain  opportunities 
for  kindness  and  service  are  so  common  that  the 
courteous  ways  of  meeting  them  can  be  formally 
taught.  To  observe  these  involves  a  reaction 
upon  the  nature  of  the  child  and  gives  his  unself- 
ish impulses  further  culture. 

Courtesy  in  the  treatment  of  the  child  is  of 
the    greatest     importance.  —  Indeed,    after     the 


TRAINING  THE   CHILD 

general  training  in  thoughtfulness  for  others 
nothing  has  greater  influence  in  shaping  the 
child's  standards  and  habits  of  politeness.  Many 
a  parent  who  is  scrupulously  courteous  to  guests 
and  even  to  servants  is  far  from  polite  in  ordi- 
nary dealings  with  the  child.  At  least  ninety- 
nine  times  in  the  hundred  nothing  is  lost  and 
much  is  gained  by  making  requests  instead  of 
commands.  And  the  unnecessary  command  is 
sometimes  the  least  objectionable  form  of  dis- 
courtesy which  children  are  compelled  to  endure. 
To  require  from  children  that  which  they  do  not 
receive  in  their  relations  with  others  in  the  home 
is  an  inconsistency  which  they  cannot  fail  to 
perceive  and  resent. 

Courtesy  should  be  the  regular  rule  and  prac- 
tise of  the  home. — The  formality  that  would 
be  expected  among  strangers  is  surely  out  of  place 
in  the  familiar  relations  of  home  life,  but  the 
essential  spirit  of  courtesy  may  be  preserved 
without  the  stiff"ness  and  unnaturalness  that 
characterized  a  child's  relations  with  his  parents 
a  hundred  years  ago.  The  child  who  is  selfish 
and  boorish  in  his  relations  with  his  brother, 
sister,  and  the  servants  cannot  radically  change 
his  conduct  when  he  is  associated  with  others 
outside  the  home.  If  by  long  practise  in  the 
application  of  two  standards  the  adult  may 
seem  to  do  it,  the  lack  of  sincerity  in  his  "com- 
pany manners"  is  sure  to  appear  in  time.  By 
the  child  even  such  a  sham  cannot  be  maintained. 

The  ease  and  self-possession  that  society 
admires  is  the  result  of  self-forgetfulness.  — 
Hence  when  the  child  is  to  be  placed  in  an  unfa- 
miliar social  environment  the  greatest  aid  to  good 

[89] 


CHILD  NATURE  AND  CHILD  NURTURE 

appearance  is  encouragement  to  seek  the  pleas- 
ure of  others.  Unselfishness  and  naturalness  are 
the  essence  of  good  manners,  and  both  are  fos- 
tered when  the  child's  thoughts  are  turned  from 
himself  to  those  with  whom  he  is  associated. 
This  very  evident  fact  simply  emphasizes  anew 
that  politeness  is  the  expression  of  unselfishness 
and  that  the  training  in  kindness  is  the  essential 
thing. 

QUESTIONS   FOR  DISCUSSION 

1.  If  a  child  has  been  accustomed  to  commands,  are  there  likely 
to  be  difficulties  in  controlling  him  if  requests  are  substituted?  If 
so,  how  may  they  be  overcome? 

2.  Just  what  polite  forms  should  be  required  of  children  in  their 
relations  with  each  other  in  the  home? 

3.  Is  the  emphasis  upon  the  use  of  the  word  "please,"  which  is 
common  in  some  homes,  a  really  vital  point  in  the  training  of  cour- 
tesy? Is  there  danger  that  it  may  sometimes  obscure  the  apprecia- 
tion of  things  that  are  essential? 

4.  Give  from  your  own  observation  incidents  illustrating  suc- 
cess or  failure  in  training  in  courtesy,  with  reasons  for  the  same  as 
far  as  they  appeared. 


[90] 


TRAINING  THE   CHILD 


Lesson   XXII.     Training    the    Child   to    an 
Interest  in  Missions 

The  missionary  spirit  is  the  broadest  expres- 
sion of  altruistic  feeling  that  we  know.  Relig- 
ion, morality,  and  even  good  citizenship  urge 
toward  such  an  attitude.  If  this  spirit  con- 
trolled the  world  today  wars  would  cease  and 
poverty  would  vanish.  Surely  it  is  to  be  cul- 
tivated in  the  heart  of  the  child.  Such  effort 
as  has  been  made  to  this  end  has  been  chiefly 
by  the  Church,  and  most  of  the  literature,  so  far 
as  it  deals  with  the  training  of  children,  has  to 
do  with  the  Sunday  school;  still  it  has  some  val- 
uable suggestions  for  the  home  if  they  are  wisely 
adapted.  Some  of  the  most  helpful  references  of 
this  kind  will  be  found  in  courses  of  mission  study 
for  primary  and  junior  grades  published  by  the 
Young  People's  Missionary  Movement,  156 
Fifth  Avenue,  New  York,  and  by  various  denom- 
inations. Seven  Little  Sisters,  by  Jane  Andrews, 
and  similar  books  used  by  kindergartners  will 
help  in  introducing  the  children  of  other  lands; 
books  like  The  Children  of  the  Poor,  by  Jacob 
Riis,  will  give  the  parent  information  that  will 
open  the  way  to  an  interest  in  city  missionary 
work;  missionary  papers  for  children,  and  espe- 
cially the  magazine  "Everyland,"  published  by 
Everyland  Publishing  Co.,  West  Mcdford,  Mass., 
will  be  helpful. 

Let  us  carry  missions  into  the  Sunday  school  pri- 
marily for  the  sake  of  our  children  themselves,  that 
they   may   come   to   their   largest  development.     The 

[91] 


CHILD  NATURE  AND  CHILD  NURTURE 

immediate  raising  of  money  is  a  trivial  thing  as  com- 
pared with  this  great  aim. 

—  J.  T.  McFarland. 

"The  spirit  of  sharing  and  self-giving  that  all  mis- 
sion study  reveals  to  him  will  stimulate  in  him  a  desire 
and  will  call  on  him  for  the  practise  of  sharing  his 
possessions  and  giving  of  himself  for  the  good  of 
others.  Indeed,  as  the  'mighty  ideal  marches  before 
him'  its  vision  will  allure  him  to  its  ever  widening 
circles  of  activity,  his  growing  soul  will  respond  until 
he  will  count  all  men  his  brethren  and  will  enter  into 
that  universal  fellowship  which  is  realized  in  the  com- 
munion of  saints  and  symbolized  in  the  Church  of 
God." 

The  child's  missionary  training  must  begin 
through  his  relations  with  those  whom  he  can 
see  and  whose   needs  he   can  understand.  —  If 

the  natural  development  of  his  unselfish  feelings 
is  to  guide  the  training,  before  foreign  missions 
should  come  home  missions,  and  before  home 
missions  at  a  distance  should  come  aid  for  the 
needy  near  his  own  home.  Such  service  of  those 
who  are  near  is  the  best  possible  training  for  the 
interest  in  foreign  missions,  for  it  is  real  training 
of  the  Impulses  that  are  back  of  all  missionary 
effort.  As  the  child  grows  older  and  comes  to 
realize  the  needs  of  those  whose  lives  differ  more 
from  his  own,  his  interest  will  naturally  broaden 
and  he  will  readily  respond  to  further  instruction. 
At  first  the  needs  of  children  will  bring  the 
largest  response.  —  His  own  experiences  have 
not  yet  prepared  him  to  sympathize  with  the 
adult.  To  him  "the  heathen"  are  very  vague 
and  unreal,  but  "a  little  boy  in  Africa"  brings 
a   real   response   from   intellect   and   heart.     The 

[92] 


TRAINING  THE   CHILD 

best  missionary  instruction  for  young  children 
is  given  in  stories  of  the  children  of  other  lands. 
After  such  knowledge  is  given  he  can  think  and 
pray  and  give  in  a  way  that  will  enlarge  his  own 
heart. 

The  more  that  the  missionary  instruction 
appeals  to  his  senses  the  more  effective  it  will 
be. — The  use  of  pictures,  curios,  toy  villages  of 
pagan  peoples,  etc.,  will  help  to  make  the  strange 
life  real  to  him.  Dolls  dressed  to  represent  his 
little  brothers  and  sisters  of  far-away  lands  will 
give  more  concreteness  and  reality  to  his  con- 
ception of  those  whom  he  is  to  serve  and  the 
conditions  that  are  to  be  corrected. 

Giving  for  missions  has  educational  value  in 
proportion  as  it  is  really  the  child's  gift.  —  The 
one  contribution  that  is  the  product  of  effort  or 
self-denial  on  his  part  has  far  greater  influence 
in  shaping  character  than  many  nominal  gifts 
that  are  furnished  by  another.  It  is  not  difficult 
to  secure  such  offerings  if  the  instruction  has 
been  of  the  kind  outlined  above. 

The  more  definitely  the  gift  is  applied  to  the 
meeting  of  particular  needs  the  greater  its  reflex 
influence  is.  —  Great  earthquakes,  famines,  and 
similar  calamities  offer  especial  opportunities  for 
such  training,  for  they  bring  conditions  of  need 
that  the  child  can  readily  comprehend.  Best  of 
all,  from  the  educational  point  of  view,  is  giving 
to  meet  the  needs  of  a  particular  child.  If  in 
such  cases  the  recipient's  name  can  be  known,  his 
picture  seen,  letters  received  from  him,  the  per- 
sonal element  is  magnified,  and  the  effect  upon 
the  character  of  the  giver  is  correspondingly 
increased.     As  the  child  grows  older  the  distinctly 

[93] 


CHILD  NATURE  AND   CHILD  NURTURE 

i 

religious  motive  can  be  more  largely  emphasized, 
and  when  he  has  learned  how  the  money  is  used 
in  many  ways  to  meet  the  individual  needs  he 
may  give  to  the  cause  in  general. 

QUESTIONS   FOR  DISCUSSION 

1.  What  gifts  can  children  make  for  other  children  of  home  or 
foreign  mission  fields? 

2.  In  what  definite  ways  may  they  practise  self-denial  to  sa\e 
money  for  gifts  for  mission  work  for  children? 

3.  What  kinds  of  doll-play  would  you  suggest  as  practical  ways 
of  carrying  out  the  suggestion  made  above? 

4.  Do  children  enjoy  working  and  giving  for  such  purposes  as 
have  been  indicated  above? 


[94] 


VIII 

TRAINING     THE     CHILD     TO     REGARD 
PROPERTY  RIGHTS 

The  desire  for  property  is  a  universal  human 
impulse.  Without  it  man  could  hardly  rise 
above  the  animal  level  of  existence.  It  aflFords 
one  the  great  means  of  rendering  to  others  help 
of  many  kinds.  Disregard  of  property  rights 
is  the  chief  source  of  crime.  Two  of  the  ten 
commandments  are  concerned  with  the  right 
attitude  toward  the  property  rights  of  others. 
The  book  of  Proverbs  is  filled  with  exhortations 
to  industry  and  frugality.  The  New  Testament 
places  great  emphasis  upon  the  duties  of  honesty 
and  generosity.  Surely  the  training  of  the  child 
in  regard  to  these  things  is  one  of  the  great  duties 
of  the  parent. 

Helpful  discussions  of  the  topics  which  are 
presented  in  Lessons  VI  to  IX  will  be  found  in 
the  following  books :  Gentle  Measures  in  the  Train- 
ing of  the  Youngs  by  Jacob  Abbott,  pp.  268-280; 
Our  Children,  by  Paul  Carus,  pp.  34-45;  Child- 
hood, by  Mrs.  Theodore  Birney,  pp.  127-135;  The 
Place  of  the  Story  in  Early  Educatio7i,  by  Sarah 
Wiltse  —  essay  on  "  Learning  to  Use  Money  ^^ 
pp.  93-98;  Studies  in  Education,  Vol.  II,  edited  by 
Earl  Barnes,  paper  on  "Ought  Children  to  be  Paid 
for    Domestic    Service?''     by    Blanche    Dismorr, 

[95] 


CHILD  NATURE  AND  CHILD  NURTURE 

pp.  62-70;  As  the  Twig  is  Bent,  by  Susan  Chenery, 
pp.  64-77,  105-115. 

A  particularly  helpful  discussion  of  several 
phases  of  the  subject  is  found  in  an  article  on 
"  Learning  to  Use  Money, '^  by  Mrs.  Luther 
Gulick  in  The  American  Kitchen  Magazine,  Vol. 
XV,  No.  2.  _ 

Property:  Its  Origin  and  Development,  by  Charles 
Letourneau,  gives  a  full  and  not  very  technical 
discussion  of  the  way  in  which  the  feeling  for 
property  has  developed  in  the  human  race. 


[96I 


REGARDING  PROPERTY  RIGHTS 


Lesson  XXIII.     How  the  Sense  of  Property 
Rights  Develops 

If  any  will  not  work,  neither  let  him  eat. 

—  2  Thess.  3  :  lo. 

Give  me  neither  poverty  nor  riches; 

Feed  me  with  the  food  that  is  needful  for  me: 

Lest  I  be  full,  and  deny  thee,  and  say,  Who  is  Jehovah? 

Or  lest  I  be  poor,  and  steal.    —  Proverbs  30  :  8,  9. 

The  way  in  which  a  man  spends  his  money  is  often 
one  of  the  surest  tests  of  his  character. 

—  William  Matthews. 

The  child  who  is  taught  at  an  early  age  the  legiti- 
mate province  of  money  will  not  be  apt,  as  he  grows 
older,  to  worship  it  or  to  fawn  upon  those  who  possess 
large  wealth.  — Mrs.  Theodore  Birney. 

What  the   desire  for  property  means.  —  It   is 

the  impulse  to  provide  from  present  plenty  for 
the  time  of  future  need.  All  races  of  men  possess 
It  to  some  extent,  and  It  becomes  more  prominent 
in  those  that  rise  to  the  higher  levels  of  civiliza- 
tion and  culture.  It  enables  man  by  Industry 
and  forethought  to  free  himself  from  the  drudg- 
ery of  constant  eflFort  to  supply  the  physical 
necessities  of  life,  and  makes  It  possible  for  him 
to  provide  for  the  higher  needs  of  his  nature. 
Money  or  other  property  Is  an  equivalent  for 
labor  and  affords  a  means  of  storing  the  product 
of  one's  effort.  It  affords  a  means  of  exchanging 
one's  own  labor  for  that  of  another.  Its  posses- 
sion makes  It  possible  for  one  to  aid  others  who 
are  at  a   distance,   and   In   ways   which   his   own 

[97] 


CHILD  NATURE  AND  CHILD  NURTURE 

strength  and  skill  would  not  permit.  The  desire 
for  property,  then,  is  a  worthy  impulse  which  is 
to  be  encouraged  in  the  child. 

The  origin  of  property.  —  Among  the  lowest 
savages  such  property  as  is  known  is  chiefly  held 
in  common,  and  may  be  used  by  any  member  of 
the  tribe  according  to  his  need.  This  is  the  case 
with  the  wild  fruits  and  grains,  the  animals 
taken  in  the  chase,  and  the  booty  of  war.  So 
the  man  uses  as  a  rude  tool  the  first  suitable 
stone  that  he  finds,  or  wrenches  from  a  tree  a 
branch  that  will  serve  him  as  a  club;  both  of  these 
he  casts  aside  when  his  need  is  satisfied,  and  the 
next  one  who  passes  may  have  them  if  he  wishes. 

But  by  and  by  the  savage  sharpens  and  pol- 
ishes the  stone,  and  carves  the  handle  of  the 
club  which  he  had  selected  with  particular  care: 
then  they  become  his  property.  He  has  expended 
effort  upon  them,  has  added  to  their  value  by  his 
own  labor,  and  now  he  asserts  his  right  to  them. 
Such  was  the  beginning  of  individual  property 
rights.  They  were  based  upon  the  creation  of 
values. 

The  young  child's  natural  sense  of  property 
rights.  —  The  natural  impulse  of  the  young 
child  is  like  that  of  the  savages  who  hold  things 
in  common.  He  takes  what  he  needs  from  the 
general  store.  He  demands  things  simply  be- 
cause he  wants  them.  Only  gradually  does  he 
learn  that  certain  things  are  his  and  that  certain 
other  things  belong  to  others.  Commonly  this 
is  taught  him  in  a  perfectly  arbitrary  way  through 
prohibitions  and  commands  and  punishments 
which  are  not  reenforced  by  any  impulses  within 
his  own  nature. 

[98] 


REGARDING  PROPERTY  RIGHTS 

Nature's  plan  (and  that  means  God's  plan) 
seems  to  be  that  he  should  learn  as  the  race  has 
done,  that  he  should  rise  out  of  the  sense  of  a 
common  ownership  in  the  home  of  the  property 
which  supplies  his  ordinary  wants  to  that  of 
individual  ownership  through  the  creation  of 
values  himself.  It  is  only  as  he  has  property 
of  his  own  that  he  can  really  appreciate  the  prop- 
erty rights  of  others.  It  is  only  as  he  makes 
things  or  works  to  earn  them,  that  he  can  feel 
the  real  basis  for  property  rights.  If  this  be  true, 
as  soon  as  it  is  possible  the  child  should  have 
property  of  his  own,  and  he  should  be  encour- 
aged to  gain  it  by  his  own  effort. 

QUESTIONS  FOR  DISCUSSION 

5.  Is  there  any  other  real  basis  for  property  rights  than  the  fact 
that  the  owner  has  in  some  way  created  value  by  his  effort? 

2.  Can  a  child  learn  to  respect  the  property  rights  of  others  with- 
out any  experience  in  controlling  property  of  his  own? 

3.  Should  a  parent  use  a  child's  property  without  his  consent? 

4.  How  far  should  a  parent  interfere  to  prevent  a  child  from 
destroying  his  own  property?  Might  there  be  a  loss  that  would  over- 
balance the  financial  one? 

5.  Should  the  child  of  well-to-do  parents  be  discouraged  from 
earning  money  by  labor  or  by  some  small  business  enterprise  out- 
side the  home? 

6.  Can  a  child  be  paid  for  services  in  the  home  without  encourag- 
ing selfishness?     Should  he  be  paid  for  all  services  or  for  only  a  few? 

7.  Is  it  better  to  give  a  child  an  allowance,  or  to  give  him  oppor- 
tunity to  earn? 


[99I 


CHILD  NATURE  AND   CHILD   NURTURE 


Lesson   XXIV.     Training   the    Child    in 
Honesty 

Just  balances,  just  weights,  just  ephah,  and  a  just 
hin  shall  ye  have.  — Lev.  19:36. 

Let  him  that  stole,  steal  no  more:  but  rather  let  him 
labor.  —  Eph,  4:  28. 

It  will  be  good,  too,  if  children  begin  young  to  earn 
money,  but  this  ought  not  to  be  done  at  the  expense 
of  their  education,  nor  in  any  way  that  would  prac- 
tically amount  to  begging,  but  in  actually  accomplish- 
ing some  useful  work  that  possesses  a  value  to  the  party 
who  pays  for  it.  —  Paul  Carus. 

The  first  step  toward  a  just  reward  for  the 
property  rights  of  others  is  to  possess  property 
of  one's  own.  — The  average  boy  has  vague  ideas 
of  property  rights  in  fruit,  for  example;  but  let 
him  make  a  strawberry  bed  of  his  own,  pull  the 
weeds,  water  the  plants,  hoe  them,  watch  the 
blossoms  as  they  come,  and  count  the  ripening 
berries.  He  is  now  able  to  take  a  new  view  of 
the  rights  of  the  neighboring  farmer.  So  the  boy 
who  has  made  a  kite  or  a  toy  wagon  has  learned 
much  more  than  the  use  of  tools;  it  has  become 
possible  for  him  to  sympathize  with  other  owners. 

But  the  possession  of  property  which  has  not 
been  earned  tends  to  weaken  the  regard  for 
others'  rights.  —  To  get  something  for  nothing 
fosters  the  feeling  that  the  rights  of  property 
may  be  based  upon  might  or  cunning  as  well 
as  upon  labor  put  forth  and  service  rendered. 
Even  the  giving  of  a  regular  allowance  is  not  as 
\  100  1 


REGARDING  PROPERTY  RIGHTS 

helpful  as  the  provision  of  an  opportunity  to 
earn,  and  for  this  reason  the  first  should  never 
wholly  displace  the  second. 

Trade  and  barter  among  the  children  may 
afford  a  moral  discipline  if  wisely  guided.  —  There 
is  a  natural  tendency  toward  this  that  appears 
in  most  children  by  the  time  that  they  have 
reached  ten  years  of  age.  Because  of  the  child's 
lack  of  good  judgment  it  is  often  discouraged 
by  the  parent,  or,  on  the  other  hand,  especial 
sharpness  in  driving  bargains  is  commended  by 
them.  By  explaining  to  the  child  that  the  under- 
lying principle  of  trade  is  not  to  get  more  than 
one  gives,  but  to  exchange  what  another  desires 
for  what  is  more  valuable  to  one's  self,  it  can  be 
made  to  contribute  to  character. 

The  child  who  takes  or  injures  another's  prop- 
erty should  replace  it  by  his  own  labor.  —  If  the 
parent  makes  restitution  the  one  who  has  been 
injured  does  not  suffer,  but  the  character  of  the 
child  who  did  the  wrong  does.  The  making  of 
restitution  on  his  own  part  gives  him  precisely 
the  lesson  that  enables  him  to  understand  the 
nature  of  the  wrong  that  he  has  done. 


A  CASE  FOR  DISCUSSION 

A  boy  of  twelve  years  obtained  ten  dollars  by  a  method  which 
he  knew  to  be  of  very  questionable  honesty.  When  it  was  discov- 
ered his  mother  said,  "The  boy  should  have  a  bank  account  of  his 
own  that  he  may  know  what  it  is  to  own  property."  She  proposed 
to  start  it  with  these  ten  dollars. 

1.  How  far  was  she  right,  and  how  far  wrong.'' 

2.  What  form  of  punishment  might  wisely  be  used  in  such  a 
case.'' 

3.  Where  is  it  probable  that  mistakes  had  been  made  in  the 
former  training  of  the  boy.^ 

4.  How  would  you  deal  with  such  a  case? 

[lOl] 


CHILD   NATURE  AND   CHILD  NURTURE 


Lesson    XXV.     Training    the    Child    in 
Prudence  and  Frugality 

He  that  loveth  pleasure  shall  be  a  poor  man: 
He  that  loveth  wine  and  oil  shall  not  be  rich. 

There  is  precious  treasure  and  oil  in  the  dwelling 
of  the  wise; 

But  a  foolish  man  swalloweth  it  up. 

—  Proverbs  21:17,  20. 

There  is  that  withholdeth  more  than  is  meet,  but  it 
tendeth  only  to  want.  —  Proverbs  ii  :  24. 

One  of  the  most  important  parts  of  the  education 
of  both  girls  and  boys  ...  is  to  teach  them  the  proper 
management  of  money.  And  this  may  very  effect- 
ively be  done  by  giving  them  a  fixed  and  definite 
income  to  manage,  and  then  throwing  upon  them  the 
responsibility  of  the  management  of  it,  with  such  a 
degree  of  guidance,  encouragement,  and  aid  as  a 
parent  can  easily  render.  —  Jacob  Abbott. 

Prudence  and  frugality  in  the  use  of  money 
have  a  moral  value.  —  The  wasteful  use  of  money 
almost  invariably  involves  self-indulgence  and  a 
pursuit  of  pleasure  that  weakens  character. 
Aside  from  this  it  gives  rise  to  two  conditions 
that  form  temptation  to  dishonesty:  it  develops 
a  habit  of  spending  money  freely,  and  at  the  same 
time  exhausts  the  resources  for  expenditure.  To 
learn  to  use  with  prudence  and  wisdom  one's 
own  property  removes  the  strongest  incentives 
to  trespass  upon  the  property  rights  of  others. 

Avarice  and  the  miserly  spirit  are  perversions 
of  this  virtue.  —  These  must  be  guarded  against 
[102] 


REGARDING   PROPERTY  RIGHTS 

In  the  training.  When  one  seeks  to  gather  money 
beyond  his  prospective  needs,  when  he  comes  to 
value  it  not  for  its  purchasing  value  but  as  an 
end  in  itself,  the  normal  desire  for  property  with 
which  nature  has  equipped  the  child  has  been 
turned  aside  from  its  natural  development.  To 
save  simply  for  the  sake  of  saving  is  not  a  virtue. 
Teaching  the  child  to  save  his  money  must  be 
thoughtfully  and  wisely  done,  or  it  may  encourage 
the  spirit  of  greed  and  the  habit  of  hoarding. 

The  child's  natural  impulse  is  to  use  his  money 
for  immediate  gratification.  —  In  most  of  his 
interests  the  young  child  lives  in  and  for  the 
present.  He  has  very  vague  conceptions  of  the 
wants  and  needs  of  tomorrow.  Say  to  the  five- 
year-old,  "I  will  give  you  this  stick  of  candy  now, 
or  if  you  will  wait  a  week  you  may  have  five 
sticks,"  and  almost  invariably  he  will  choose  one 
stick  at  the  present  time.  Make  the  same  offer 
to  a  ten-year-old  child  and  the  result  will  be 
reversed,  because  the  future  is  more  real  to  him. 
This  disposition  of  the  young  child  to  prefer  a 
present  pleasure  to  a  much  greater  one  at  a  future 
time  is  the  one  that  is  to  be  gradually  counter- 
acted by  the  training  In  frugality  and  prudence. 

The  child  learns  to  use  money  wisely  not  by 
saving,  but  by  spending.  —  To  permit  a  child  to 
earn  regularly,  or  to  give  him  a  small  but  definite, 
allowance  and  guide  him  in  the  wise  use  of  It, 
will  develop  traits  of  character  that  could  not  be 
encouraged  by  a  gift  of  money  to  be  deposited 
in  a  bank.  Even  young  children  may  be  advan- 
tageously dealt  with  in  this  way,  and  may  learn 
to  spend  wisely  and  to  save  for  future  use  if  the 
expenditures  are  fully  discussed,  but  the  child  is 

[103] 


CHILD  NATURE  AND   CHILD  NURTURE 

left  to  make  the  final  decision  and  to  suffer  the 
consequences  of  unwise  choice.  (Several  of  the 
readings  recommended  above,  particularly  those 
by  Gulick  and  Abbott,  discuss  methods  in  detail.) 

A  CASE  FOR  DISCUSSION 

A  Christian  mother,  in  evident  distress  of  mind,  told  a  friend 
that  her  son  had  been  guilty  of  dishonesty,  and  asked  for  advice. 
When  he  asked  the  circumstances  she  repHed,  "He  has  taken  money 
from  his  bank  to  buy  candy."  "From  his  bank?"  said  the  friend. 
"Well,"  said  the  mother,  "that  is  what  he  said  when  I  punished  him, 
but  the  money  was  not  given  him  to  spend  but  to  save." 

1.  Is  it  wise  to  "give"  a  child  money  that  is  not  really  his? 

2.  Is  it  wise  to  permit  a  child  to  spend  all  or  most  of  his  money 
for  candy .'' 

3.  Is  urging  the  child  to  save  for  no  purpose  in  particular  the 
best  mode  of  counteracting  such  a  tendency  or  desire.^ 

4.  Suppose  the  parents  had  encouraged  the  child  to  deny  him- 
self candy  at  least  a  part  of  the  time  for  several  weeks  that  he  might 
buy  a  kite.  Suppose  that  as  he  grew  older  he  was  led  to  save  for  a 
longer  period  that  he  might  buy  a  fishing-rod.  Suppose  that  still 
later  he  saved  for  a  year  or  for  several  years  to  buy  a  watch  or 
bicycle.  He  would  not  have  his  money  in  the  bank,  but  would  he 
have  anything  to  compensate  for  that  lack.? 

5.  What  discipline  of  character  would  he  have  gained.? 

6.  What  is  the  relation  of  such  training  to  economy  and  thrift? 


104 


REGARDING   PROPERTY  RIGHTS 


Lesson  XXVI.     Training  the   Child   in 
Generosity 

It  is  more  blessed  to  give  than  to  receive. 

—  Acts  20:  35. 

He  that  giveth,   let  him   do  it  with   simplicity. 

—  RoM.  12  :  8. 

Let  him  labor  .  .  .  that  he  may  have  to  give  to 
him  that  needeth.  —  Eph.  4  :  28. 

The  natural  selfishness  of  the  child  must  be 
recognized.  —  As  has  been  pointed  out  in  an 
earlier  lesson,  this  natural  tendency  is  essential  to 
the  development  of  honesty,  and  should  not  be 
entirely  eradicated.  To  force  the  child  to  give 
against  his  will  can  hardly  be  helpful.  Indeed 
he  may  react  against  such  treatment,  feeling  that 
he  is  wronged,  and  become  more  selfish. 

But  the  germs  of  unselfishness  are  in  every 
child.  —  These  generous  impulses,  however  weak, 
should  be  led  to  expression  that  they  may  grow 
through  exercise.  In  case  of  the  only  child  in  a 
family,  or  of  others  where  unselfishness  is  not 
naturally  fostered  in  every-day  life,  there  is  need 
of  special  training. 

The  formation  of  a  habit  of  giving  is  not  enough. 
—  The  child  who  is  taught  to  bring  a  penny  to 
church  may  continue  to  do  so  when  he  is  a  man 
and  his  gifts  should  be  dollars.  To  give  at  Sun- 
day school  an  offering  which  has  been  provided 
by  another  for  that  purpose  is  not  a  training  in 
generosity.  When  a  child  gives  what  he  has 
earned  by  his  own  effort,  or  what  has  been  given 
him  for  his  own  use,  genuinely  unselfish  feelings 
[105] 


CHILD  NATURE  AND  CHILD  NURTURE 

find  expression,  and  those  feelings  gain  a  larger 
place  in  his  nature  through  the  expression. 

If  training  is  to  be  effective,  unselfishness  must 
be  its  own  reward.  —  When  a  child  does  an  unself- 
ish act  from  a  generous  impulse  and  a  parent 
rewards  him  for  it,  a  selfish  feeling  is  substituted 
for  the  unselfish  one.  A  child  said,  "If  I  give 
this  penny  for  the  missionaries,  will  you  give  me 
another.?"  The  mistake  that  had  been  made  in 
the  child's  training  is  very  obvious.  The  natural 
glow  of  pleasure  that  follows  an  unselfish  act  is 
nature's  reward,  and  it  is  enough. 

QUESTIONS  FOR  FURTHER  DISCUSSION 

1.  In  what  ways  can  a  young  child  give  expression  to  really  gen- 
erous feeling? 

2.  Is  generosity  developed  when  a  child  gives  away  broken  toys 
and  other  things  that  he  does  not  want? 

3.  Would  you  allow  a  child  to  give  away  playthings  that  he 
really  prizes? 

4.  Can  a  child  be  taught  from  the  first  to  give  a  certain  propor- 
tion of  his  income?     Is  it  wise  to  give  such  training? 

5.  Does  the  usual  observance  of  Christmas  cultivate  generosity 
or  selfishness  in  children?     What  reforms,  if  any,  might  be  made? 


[106I 


o  v^    ju  o  a, 


SIAIEHOKMalSGJOOj 


' '  'i^rt^^^^^'i^S^^ 


